


when things fall into place

by woodchoc_magnum



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: COVID-19, Caring Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Christopher Diaz Has Two Dads, Christopher Diaz is a National Treasure, Domestic Fluff, Falling In Love, M/M, Oblivious Evan "Buck" Buckley, Pandemics, Sharing a Bed, Soft Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:56:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 21,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27668525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/woodchoc_magnum/pseuds/woodchoc_magnum
Summary: In which Eddie asks Buck to move in with them during lockdown to help look after Christopher, which leads to certain unresolved feelings being resolved.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 152
Kudos: 862





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Manifesting for Season 4!
> 
> This is the first time I've included anything about the pandemic in my fics, so apologies if my knowledge of lockdowns in America is a little clunky.
> 
> Also - I'm not sure what timeline the show is going to use, but Google told me that LA went into lockdown at the end of March 2020, so this fic is set from March 2020 to the end of April 2020 (so for the purposes of this fic, Christopher went to camp in late February/early March).
> 
> Enjoy!

Cover by [Ronordmann](https://ronordmann.tumblr.com/) ❤

* * *

When news first began to trickle through to the 118 of a potential pandemic, Buck dismissed it. A pandemic? In 2020? That wasn't something that happened in America – that was something you'd hear about happening in Asia, and they'd wear masks for a while and it would occasionally be on the news until everyone forgot about it.

But then New York went into lockdown, and the looming crisis suddenly became very real.

Christopher had only been back from camp for a week when they were called into a meeting at the station, and Bobby laid down some hard facts – it was looking like the state would be locking down as well, but as they were essential workers they would be coming to work as normal.

And that was when dread really began to set in, because everyone else had families to be with. As soon as the meeting was over, Chimney was on the phone to Maddie, making plans to move in together, and not five minutes after that, he called Albert and extended the invitation to him as well.

Hen had Karen, Bobby had Athena, and Eddie had Christopher, but Buck was alone. He guessed he was okay with that – his sister was in a serious relationship, so it wasn't like he could ask to stay with her and Chimney. It was just the thought of being stuck in the loft by himself when he wasn't at work – usually he was out and about all the time, mostly with Eddie and Christopher. He wasn't going to be able to see Christopher for what might be _weeks_ , and god forbid, maybe _months._

He didn't really have a solution to the problem – he wasn't going to ask Eddie if they could quarantine together. Eddie had Christopher to worry about, most importantly, so Buck was just going to have to suck it up and prepare to be on his own indefinitely.

They were all changing in the locker rooms when Eddie said to him, "Hey man, you should come over tonight to see Chris."

Hen made a sympathetic noise. "Yeah, Buck. This is going to suck for you."

He shrugged. "It is what it is. Sure, I'll come over."

"I know Maddie's going to be worried about you, Buck," Chimney said, slipping into his coat. "We've got a full house though."

"It's okay," he replied. "I'm fine. I'll take extra shifts to keep me busy."

"Well, you'll let us know if you're struggling on your own, all right?" Hen said to him with concern. "Don't think you can't ask for help if you need it. We don't want you to be too isolated, Buck."

He smiled at her gratefully. "I'll be okay," he replied, though he didn't really believe it. "I've got a lot of Netflix to catch up on."

He didn't notice the lingering look Eddie gave him – his back was turned, shoving clothes into his backpack. He turned around and realised Eddie was waiting for him near the door, and then followed him out to their cars.

"I'll swing in and grab some food," Buck said to him. "You want me to go to the Mexican place? We should do it now before everything closes."

"Yeah, cool," Eddie replied. "I'll meet you at home."

~

Eddie's house had felt a lot like Buck's home over the last few years. In some ways, he was more comfortable there than he was at his loft. He pulled in right behind Eddie's truck in the driveway, waving to the neighbour across the street as he loped up the walkway to the house.

The door was open, and Christopher was waiting just inside for him, a huge smile on his face. "Buck!"

"Hey buddy," he exclaimed, passing the bags of food to Eddie before bending over to embrace him. "How was school?"

"It was good, but Dad says that I won't be going to school soon." Christopher clung to him tightly.

"Yeah, I know, buddy. Big changes are happening." Buck knelt to his eye level. "And you won't see me as much."

"We gotta talk about that," Eddie interrupted him from the table. "Come and have dinner."

Buck made a confused face at him, standing upright again. "What's there to talk about?"

Eddie shrugged, laying food out on the table. "We can't have you on your own indefinitely," he said, flashing a smile at Christopher as he sat down. "And Chris isn't going to like not seeing you all the time."

"We can Facetime," Buck suggested, wandering into the kitchen to grab them some drinks. "Every day, if you want."

Eddie didn't respond, which meant he definitely had something else in mind but didn't want to discuss it in front of Christopher. Buck set a pitcher of water down in the middle of the table and took his seat, passing Eddie his spicy burrito.

Christopher filled the silence while they ate dinner, very animatedly explaining to Buck about one of his school assignments – he had to write a story, as long as he wanted, with a beginning, middle and an end.

"It's set in medieval England," he said, "and it's about a princess being rescued by a brave knight."

"That sounds awesome," Buck replied, wiping salsa from his lips. "Have you let your dad read any yet?"

Christopher shook his head, exchanging a quick glance with Eddie. "Not until it's done."

"I'm sure it'll be great," Eddie replied, ruffling his hair. "English is your best subject."

"You'll let me read it too, right?" Buck asked.

"Uh huh. Buck, what's your favourite time in history ever?" Christopher asked him curiously. "If you had a time machine, where would you go?"

"Uh…" he thought about it for a moment, chewing his lower lip. "I don't know, bud. I kinda like here and now."

"I know," Eddie said, smiling at Buck, "but the time machine would have to be big enough for us all to go together."

"Where?" Christopher asked him eagerly.

"Well, first stop would be to see the dinosaurs," Eddie said loftily, as Christopher began to giggle, "and then the Hanging Gardens of Babylon—"

"What are they?" Christopher interrupted.

"They were meant to be spectacular. Babylon was a city in the Middle East, kind of where Iraq is now. I think I'd want to see all the ancient wonders of the world first, and then maybe stop in and see if Atlantis was real—"

"You'd have to find it first," Buck pointed out.

"We've got a time machine; it'll do the finding for us," Eddie said reasonably. "And then—"

"And then we go see the Vikings," Christopher said excitedly.

"Yep, the Vikings, and the Roman Empire, maybe stop by the fall of Troy—"

"Eddie, you've done way too much thinking about this," Buck said with a laugh.

Eddie shrugged at him. "I read a lot of history books when I was in Afghanistan. It's interesting."

"I didn't know that about you."

"Well, I've got layers, Buck," he replied, raising his eyebrows at Christopher, who was giggling. "We can't know everything about everyone all the time."

"I have layers," Buck retorted. "You just… haven't unpeeled them yet."

"Ew," Christopher said with a grimace.

"Yeah, ew, don't get weird, man," Eddie teased, kicking him under the table. "Eat your burrito and then I'm going to beat your ass on the Playstation."

"You said a bad word, Dad."

"I know, but you're smart enough not to repeat me." Eddie raised his eyebrows at Christopher, who laughed.

~

With Christopher in bed, the dishes done and put away, Buck started organising himself to head home. "Don't leave yet," Eddie said as he grabbed him by the elbow. "I need to talk to you."

"What's up?" Buck asked as he was dragged over to the couch.

Eddie sat down, raking a hand through his hair. "Listen… you can say no," he said nervously. "But here's the situation. I'm kinda stuck. I can't afford to not work, and I can't leave Christopher with anyone else. My Abuela is high risk and I can't expect her to be running around after him – she's offered, but I just can't do that to her. Pepa's an essential worker. My parents offered to have him come stay with them, but you know how I feel about that."

"Yep," Buck said dryly.

He nodded, letting out a breath. "So I'm gonna ask you a huge favour, and I expect you to say no. I'm pretty sure you're going to say no."

"What is it?"

"Well… you and I don't really have anyone apart from each other," he pointed out, looking about as nervous and uncomfortable as Buck had ever seen him. "And there's a pandemic, and I don't want you stuck on your own. Christopher won't handle not seeing you all the time, and… I kinda like having you around. Like, a lot."

Buck's heart lifted. "You do?"

"Yeah, I kinda like you," Eddie said, his cheeks reddening. "You know I do. Listen… how would you feel about quarantining with us here? I know there aren't enough beds, but I can buy a futon for the living room and you can sleep there, or we can share my bed. Unless you're planning on jumping my bones in the middle of the night."

Buck was too surprised to make a joke, and instead he clarified, "You want me to stay here with you guys?"

Eddie nodded. "Yep."

"I could be here for _months._ We don't know how long this is going to last, and Bobby said thinking that it'll be over in a couple of weeks is unrealistic."

"Yeah, but here's the other thing." Eddie paused, tapping his knuckles on the table. "Christopher is going to be home twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. He's going to be doing online school. I was kinda hoping we could work out a schedule where… one of us is here, and the other is at work, and vice versa. I'm basically asking you to help me parent my son, Buck, and… I wouldn't do this, but you're the only person I trust with him and honestly the only person I know I won't want to murder if you're staying here with us, so…" he trailed off. "I'm kinda hoping you'll say yes."

It was an opportunity too good to pass up. Lockdown with his two favourite people? It sounded incredible. "Yes," Buck said instantly. "Of course. I was dreading being on my own."

Eddie sagged with relief, as though a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. "Really?"

"Yeah, man. Of course."

"I didn't want to ask you at work with everyone around, in case you said no," Eddie said. "And I didn't want to get Christopher's hopes up."

Buck grinned at him. "Well, the answer is yes. And listen… I know money is tight for you, so I can pay you—"

"No, no, I don't want money," Eddie interrupted. "You'll still have rent for your place to think about. This isn't about money – well, it is, but it's more about me keeping my shifts at work."

"Yeah, about that," Buck said, leaning back against the couch cushions. "Um… I have money. I could take time off."

Eddie frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I have money. I could take… a couple of months off."

"Months," he clarified, looking confused.

"Yeah. So… you keep your shifts, and I look after Christopher and cook dinner and stuff," he said with a shrug. "If you want. Or I could cut right back and only work weekends, but… um… I don't have any debt."

Eddie was staring at him, his face screwed up. "You don't have any debt."

"No."

"How do you not have any debt?"

Buck shrugged, and said ruefully, "Rich parents."

"Oh." Eddie turned to face him, tucking his leg underneath himself. "So… your car, the apartment—"

"I paid for all of that, but I don't have any student loans, and I have money sitting in a savings account that I can access. I don't actually buy a lot of stuff so… I just have money," he said, embarrassed. "Is that okay?"

"Why would it not be okay? I mean, I wondered, like… your apartment is really nice," Eddie said, looking around his own house as if he was embarrassed by it. "Like, I can understand if you'd rather quarantine there than here."

"But if I were there, I'd be lonely and bored out of my brain, and here… I get to be with you guys," he replied. "No contest."

"Really?" Eddie asked hopefully.

"Yes, Eddie," he said with a laugh, giving him a shove. "Come on, man."

Eddie smiled gratefully at him. "Seriously, thank you – like, it means a lot that you'd do this for me."

"Anything, man. You know that. We'll figure it out."

~~

Eddie was still puzzling over it the next afternoon when he and Buck went to the loft to pack up as much as they could fit in both their cars. He emptied out the fridge while Buck packed a couple of suitcases upstairs, looking around the apartment and at its shiny, stainless steel appliances. He'd helped Buck move in what little furniture he had – almost nothing – and he'd been there when Buck had bought the electronics, couch and the bed, but he'd never considered how Buck was paying for any of it.

Rich parents certainly explained a lot, he thought, bagging up the last of Buck's groceries. They'd talked about their childhoods from time to time, and he'd guessed that Buck's family was upper middle class, but Buck had never gone into too much detail. He didn't really have a taste for the finer things in life and was more at home in bars and cheap fast-food places than he was in restaurants.

Not that Eddie had ever seen him in a restaurant, though… he wanted to, one day. Maybe on a date, one day. Hopefully.

And _maybe_ he'd used Christopher as the reason why Buck should stay with them, when the real reason was that he couldn't stand not being able to see him all the time. Maybe.

Buck descended the stairs with his suitcase and pillow. "All right," he said, dumping them near the door. "I'll just grab the Xbox and games."

Eddie leaned against the bench, watching as he reached behind the television to unplug everything. "Did you tell Maddie?"

"Yeah, I said I'd be at your place if she needed me. She's busy moving in with Chim and Albert today."

"And she was… okay?"

Buck glanced over at him with a grin. "Yeah, she said she figured I would. And then she started crying because she didn't know when we'd see each other again, and I said, Maddie, Facetime. We'll see each other all the time."

"That's different. I knew Chris would hate it," Eddie said quietly. "He's really going to struggle."

"With no school?"

"Yeah, he loves it."

"Well, the offer still stands. I can take time off." Buck finally unhooked his Xbox and began wrapping cords around it. "If you want me to."

Eddie wasn't sure what the answer was. Either they both went to work but on different shifts, so one could be with Christopher, or he took Buck up on his offer and let him stay home. It was tempting. He really couldn't afford to lose any income.

With Buck waiting patiently, he said hesitantly, "If it's not asking too much of you."

"You trust me to monitor his schoolwork?" Buck asked with a grin, filling a bag with the console and games.

"If he starts failing, we'll reassess," Eddie said pointedly, and Buck laughed. "But yeah, I trust you. You're better at helping him with his homework than I am."

"You put a lot of faith in me, Diaz."

Eddie shrugged at him. "You've never let me down."

They shared a long look, and Buck smiled. "Okay. Let's do this."

~

The arrangement was that they'd share a bed, which Eddie was fine with – he'd suggested it – but also, uneasy about. Sharing a bed meant intimacy, and he hadn't been with anyone since Shannon died. They made an agreement not to tell anyone about it – it wasn't worth all the jokes Chimney would make – but he still felt uncertain about having Buck in his bedroom.

Thankfully, Buck seemed to be feeling the same way, as he dragged his suitcase in there and then stood in the middle of the room, gazing at Eddie with high eyebrows. "You sure?"

Eddie nodded. "Yep."

"Positive?"

"Yep. Come on. Let's get you set up." He'd already made space in his wardrobe and drawers, and Christopher sat on the bed and watched while they unpacked.

"It's like Buck's moving in," Christopher commented, as Eddie was hanging Buck's clothes in the closet. "I always wanted Buck to move in."

Buck cast him an amused look. "Your dad might feel differently."

"Nah, we'll keep you around," Eddie replied affectionately. "You're all right."

"Aw, thanks, Eds." Buck finished putting his clothes away, zipped up the suitcase, and let Eddie take it to stow in the hall closet. When he returned to the bedroom, he found Buck sitting on the floor, looking up at Christopher, who was squeezing his cheeks with both hands.

"Um… what are you doing?"

"I don't know," Buck replied quizzically.

"This girl in my class is blind and she feels people's faces," Christopher explained, his brow furrowed in concentration as he squished Buck's nose.

"I think your technique is a little off," Eddie said, kneeling beside Buck on the floor. "Like this." He took Buck by the shoulders, turning him so they were face-to-face, closed his eyes, and ghosted his fingers down his face. "See?"

"Oh."

"I feel like a guinea pig," Buck complained.

Without missing a beat, Christopher said, "You look like one too."

"Christopher!" Eddie exclaimed, as Buck fell over laughing. "That's rude!"

Christopher was giggling, both hands over his mouth. He was a smart-ass like his mother and Eddie loved him for it, ruffling his hair as he rose to his feet. "Come on, you two," he said. "Let's have some lunch."

~

That night, Eddie stepped into his bedroom after his shower and found Buck sitting on his side of the bed, back to the door, gazing down at his phone. "This is weird," Eddie commented, and Buck glanced over at him with a grin. "This is really weird."

"You think?" Buck was wearing a threadbare LAFD t-shirt and a pair of sweats. "Your bed is… not great, Eddie."

"What's wrong with it?"

Buck pushed down on the mattress and said, "It's as hard as a rock."

"It is?" he asked, bewildered. He'd never really noticed before.

Buck turned to him incredulously. "Yes. Do you like a hard bed?"

"I don't know; this is just… my bed," he complained. "I never thought about it."

"Aren't you the one always complaining that your neck hurts or your hip—"

"That's different," he said, turning down the blanket on his side. "That's not from my bed."

Buck raised his eyebrows. "How do you know it's not from your bed?"

Eddie screwed his face up. "I just do. Shut up."

Buck bounced up and down a little, and murmured, "It squeaks too."

"Are you going to complain literally the whole time you're here?"

"Not a complaint; just an observation." Buck set the alarm on his phone and placed it on the bedside table. "So I'll talk to Bobby tomorrow about changing my shifts," he said with a yawn, settling onto his side, facing Eddie. "And we should be good. I don't think it'll be a problem."

"He's always been pretty flexible," Eddie murmured. "At least we still have Carla for the next couple of days. And then it's mostly you, buddy."

"I got this."

Eddie smiled warmly at him. "Yeah, that's why I asked you."

"I'm really glad you did," Buck confessed. "I was kinda freaking out about… being on my own. I hardly spend any time at the loft. I think I would've gone crazy."

Eddie lay down beside him, furrowing his brow. "What would you have done if I hadn't asked?"

Buck lifted his shoulders. "I don't know. Worked a lot. Worked out a lot. Maybe take up drinking professionally."

"You're not doing that." Eddie reached over to pat his shoulder. "You're here. This will be good."

"Yeah, it will. Hey, listen… um… ever since the tsunami I occasionally have nightmares," Buck admitted, looking anywhere but Eddie's face. "I can go months without them but I'm just warning you that… it could happen while I'm here, and I'm sorry in advance."

"You never went to therapy," he guessed, surprised that Buck was admitting to it. Christopher had told him about a conversation he'd had with Buck after the tsunami, where they'd talked about their nightmares.

"Nope. You going to call me out for that, Eddie?" Buck arched an eyebrow at him.

"Nope. I get it. I had nightmares after Afghanistan; not so much anymore," he admitted, turning onto his side to face Buck. They usually slept facing each other when they were crashed out in the bunk room at work, but it was a bit weird having Buck so close. Close enough to touch.

Buck was looking around at the bare walls of Eddie's bedroom. "Why don't you have any pictures in here?"

He shrugged. "I put them all out in the living room for Christopher."

"No, I mean… you don't even have like a painting or anything. Or a scenic photo," Buck murmured.

"Haven't been anywhere, man. I just… I don't know. The walls don't bother me. I try to make the rest of the house nice for Chris, but I'm not a decorator."

Buck nodded thoughtfully, and then said, "I think you've done okay, but we need to talk about this bed."

Eddie groaned. "It's not that bad!"

"Would you hate me if I bought you a new bed?"

"Yes," he said flatly.

Buck smirked. "I'm gonna take the risk anyway."

~~

Buck awoke the following morning after a restless night's sleep – the bed was _fucking terrible_ , and yet Eddie had slept soundly all night, not stirring at all when Buck stood up to stretch his aching muscles at 3am.

And now the bastard had the nerve to smile sleepily up at him and murmur, "Sleep well?"

He could be sarcastic; he could say something flippant, but instead he resolved to buy a new bed and said instead, "Yeah, for… sleeping in a new bed with a person for the first time in a long time."

"Mmm." Eddie yawned, stretching his arms over his head. His t-shirt rode up, exposing tanned skin. "You didn't wake me up at all."

Buck eyed him, biting back a smile. Eddie had kicked him, multiple times, and he wasn't sure what the hell was going on with his toenails. He was sure he'd been scratched in the middle of the night.

"Did I wake you?" Eddie asked as he stood, hitching up his sweats.

"No," Buck lied. "You were fine." _But we're doing something about this bed and those toenails._

~

Bobby was surprised to hear that Buck was going to be staying with Eddie, and even more surprised when Buck asked to cut his hours right back.

"Are you sure?" he asked, confused. "You're the one who always wants to take extra shifts—"

"I told Eddie I'd do this for him," Buck replied. "And I can afford to take the time; he can't. Plus, someone's got to look after Christopher. He's a smart kid but it would be neglectful to leave him on his own."

Bobby bit back a grin. "I should've known you'd end up at Eddie's. Athena guessed that was where you'd go. You wouldn't handle being on your own for so long."

"No, I'd hate it," he confessed, "but… I'm single, so… I can't expect anyone to take me in."

"Except your best friend." Bobby scrawled some notes in his book, nodding. "Okay, we can work around this, but if you wanted to take weekend shifts, that would be preferable."

"Yep, I can do that."

"Good. I'll make the changes."

It was decided that Buck would work long shifts over the weekend, thus giving some of the other crew members some time off. He'd start work at 7pm on Fridays and finish at 7pm on Sundays – forty-eight hours, but with a long break in the middle so he could get some rest.

The weird thing was that nobody else seemed to think it was strange. Hen mentioned how relieved she was that he wouldn't be on his own, and even Chimney made a crack about him not having to go stir crazy on his own. So they'd been worried about him, which was nice to know.

On the Thursday before lockdown, he left work early to organise a new bed for Eddie, and then caught up with Maddie at a café for an early meal. She handed him a bag with a bunch of different-sized cloth masks, already wearing a brightly-coloured one herself. "I'm going to miss seeing your face."

"You'll see me all the time," he promised. "We'll Facetime."

"It's not the same, and now I live with two boys," she said, rolling her eyes. "And they argue about everything."

He laughed. "They'll get over it."

"I bet you and Eddie argue; you guys are so different."

"No, we don't. We never really argue about anything. He knows me better than anyone," he replied, glancing up as the waiter approached them.

They placed their meal orders, and he was sipping a glass of water when she leaned forward and asked curiously, "What do you mean, he knows you better than anyone?"

"Oh, just… I don't know, we just understand each other," he said with a shrug. "I mean, I only need to look at him to know what he's thinking. I know everything about him. He's the only person who… no, I'm not going to say it. I don't want to jinx anything."

Maddie's eyes narrowed. "Tell me," she demanded, and kicked him under the table.

He let out a laugh. "He just gets me, Maddie. He just… knows me so well. If I'm having a bad day at work, he'll stop everyone from teasing me; he'll give me space… if I'm having a good day and he is too, we can just banter all day long. I've told him things that I haven't even told you. He's the best friend I ever had in my life. I don't know what I'd do without him, honestly. The thought of spending weeks or months without being able to see him and Christopher was just… so depressing. I know I'd get all in my head."

She gave him a sad look. "I was worried about you being on your own without your friends indefinitely. I'm glad you asked Eddie if you could stay."

"No, he asked me," he corrected. "He asked me to stay with them. I'm going to take time off work and look after Christopher for him."

Her eyebrows lifted with surprise. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah, it's not like he can call Carla," he replied nonchalantly. "She'll be working with her other clients, and she can't just sit around and babysit Christopher all day. But I can."

"You'll go stir crazy," Maddie predicted. "Are you sure about this?"

He nodded. "Yeah, it'll be fun. I think I'll have a blast, honestly. He's the best kid in the world."

"Yeah, but… you won't be able to leave the house and take him to the park, and kids have pent-up energy."

"And you think I don't? I'll keep him busy."

He couldn't see beneath the mask, but he could tell Maddie was grinning at him. "It's like your Eddie's housewife," she teased. "Staying home, taking care of the children, doing the cooking… you might fall in love."

"Bold of you to assume we're not already in love," he said, arching his eyebrows at her – he just wanted to provoke a reaction, and sure enough, her eyebrows flew up and she leaned forward eagerly. "No, I was joking! Just joking."

"Ugh," she complained, slumping back in her seat, rolling her eyes. "I mean, it wouldn't be a surprise to me, if you were. For the last year especially you two have been inseparable, but Eddie seems pretty straight to me. Does he know you're bisexual?"

Buck nodded. "Yeah, I told him a few months after we first met. Everybody knows about me, but yeah. Eddie's straight."

"Too bad," she remarked. "You two would be so cute together. I know how much you love Christopher. You're such a good uncle to him. Uncle Buck," she said, and without warning, her eyes welled up. "Oh god. Sorry. I'm just going to miss you so much."

He passed her a napkin, chuckling affectionately. "We'll talk all the time."

"It's not the same, and you know it."

~

To say that Eddie wasn't pleased about his new bed was an understatement. Buck had it delivered while they were both at work (having brought Carla on as an accomplice), and when they arrived home, Eddie stared at it with his hands on his hips, dismayed. "I told you not to do this."

"Yeah, well, I did it," Buck replied, throwing clean sheets on the bed.

"But I told you not to."

"But I did."

Eddie let out a huff of breath, shaking his head at Buck. "You're a pain in the ass."

"Yeah, I kinda am," he agreed, "but you won't have a sore back or hip tomorrow, so you'll thank me later."

He grumbled for a few moments, and then finally said, "I'll pay you back."

"You don't have to; you're letting me stay here. That's good enough for me." Buck began to tuck in the fitted sheet, and finally Eddie stepped into the room to help him make the bed.

Once the duvet was on, he sat down tentatively and then flopped on his back, shaking his head at Buck disapprovingly. "I hate how nice it is."

Buck grinned at him. "You'll get over that quickly."

"Yeah, we'll see."

~~

Sure enough, by the time they were settling down to sleep, Eddie's complaints had all but ceased. He was curled up on his side, a pillow tucked under his head and the blanket draped over him, looking as contented as Buck had ever seen him.

"Good, right?" Buck said, a little smugly.

"Shut up," Eddie mumbled. "I hate it."

"You really don't." Buck settled down beside him, marvelling at how easily they'd settled into a nightly routine. Eddie was nice to sleep next to – despite his occasional kicking – but more than that, it was nice to sleep in a bed with someone, and to wake up beside his best friend every morning.

The other nice thing? Eddie didn't snore.

Eddie was on the verge of sleep, but murmured, "How was Maddie?"

"She's good, but she's hiding something from me. I can tell," Buck replied thoughtfully.

Eddie furrowed his brow. "Bad?"

"No, just… she seemed like she had a secret. Not a bad secret, but something she wasn't telling me." He finished setting the alarm on his phone and set it on the bedside table. "Maybe they're engaged?"

"Why wouldn't she tell you? You know Chim can't keep a secret like that to save his life; he'd be singing it from the rooftop."

"It was just a thought." Buck reached out to flick the light off. "I don't know."

"Maybe she's pregnant," Eddie murmured.

"She's 42."

"So?"

Buck lay there, puzzling about it, trying to put the pieces together. "I thought… now, I'm not a doctor."

Eddie chuckled. "This we know."

"But I thought the eggs went bad after a while."

He snorted, reaching over to shove Buck lightly. "Has it been that long since you did high school sex education? Do you want a refresher? I'm pretty sure Christopher has to start learning about it soon, maybe you should sit in on the classes."

"Well, I don't know!" he protested.

"Clearly," Eddie retorted. "As I understand it, as women age, the number of eggs they release decrease, and the risk of something going wrong with the pregnancy increases. That's why they call it a geriatric pregnancy if a woman is over 35."

"Oh. So Maddie would be…"

"High risk, but not infertile."

"High risk," he repeated nervously. "Like, something could go wrong."

"Yeah, but she'll have doctors looking after her and possibly a midwife," Eddie said with a yawn. "So if she is pregnant, she's in good hands. Plus, she lives with a paramedic."

"True." Buck felt a flutter of excitement. "I could be an uncle."

"Yeah, you'd be great at it," Eddie murmured, reaching out to rest his hand on Buck's chest. "They'd be lucky to have you."

"You think?" he asked quietly.

"Mmmhmm." Eddie's breathing was evening out. "'m sleepy."

"Good night," Buck said softly, turning his head to the side, watching as he slowly dropped off to sleep. Eddie's hand remained splayed across his chest, a comforting weight, and Buck drifted off to sleep as well.

~

Once lockdown began, they settled into an easy routine. Eddie was out the door by 7.30am for his 8am start, and he was home by 7pm every night. They set Christopher up with a workstation in the dining room, and while he was attending his Zoom classes, Buck busied himself with projects around the house. The first was re-grouting the entire bathroom, which took him a full day, and the second was fixing the wonky railing at the front of the house.

He listened in on a lot of Christopher's classes, sitting across from him at the table and trying not to distract him. Sometimes he'd be sent down the rabbit hole himself, googling what the teacher was talking about and reading through endless Wikipedia pages.

He started baking bread, jumping on the bandwagon with everyone else in lockdown, and Eddie and Christopher certainly reaped the rewards when he finally figured it out. He started with basic loaves of white bread and then branched out, ordering fresh supplies with their grocery shopping so he could make pumpkin bread, banana bread, rye, grain, pumpernickel and anything else he could think of. He learned how to make cinnamon rolls from scratch as well, and one day he and Christopher made them in the afternoon, so they were hot and fresh when Eddie came home from work.

Christopher suggested they plant a vegetable garden, so that was his next project. He ordered a bunch of seeds and potting supplies from Amazon and built a small garden in the backyard, hoping to grow some tomatoes, cucumbers, mixed herbs and even pumpkins, though he wasn't sure how successful that would be. He and Christopher spent a lot of time in the garden in the afternoons, wandering around, making plans to rip out some plants and buy new ones. When they told Eddie their ideas, he just looked at them like they were crazy and shrugged. The man was not interested in gardening, at all, but he was happy to go along with whatever Buck and Christopher were doing.

Eddie was working long hours, and when he arrived home from work and they'd eaten dinner it was dedicated father-son time. Buck usually left them to their own devices while he chatted to Maddie or the rest of the team, depending on who was bored at work. Eddie would put Christopher to bed and then join him in the bedroom, where they'd lie on the bed and debrief about the day's events.

It was Buck's favourite part of the day, lying with Eddie and listening to his stories from work. It made him miss being at the station, but hopefully once the pandemic was behind them – whenever that might be – he'd be back with the team where he belonged.

Besides, he had his weekend shifts, and by Friday he was looking forward to a change of scenery. The only instruction he left for Eddie on the weekends was not to kill his vegetable garden and not to kill his yeast starter, or to touch it, or to look at it or go anywhere near it at all. Eddie had narrowed his eyes at the list of instructions, and when Buck returned home on the first Sunday evening he found that Eddie had written "NO TOUCH" on the jar, as if to remind himself not to throw it away.

~

They'd been cohabitating for just over two weeks when Eddie arrived home later than usual, having come straight from work without showering, still covered in dirt and soot. Buck had just put Christopher to bed when he finally arrived, laying to rest the small amount of fear that something had happened to him without Buck there to have his back.

"You okay?" Buck said quietly, helping him with his bag as he stepped into the house. They always took their shoes off outside, trying to decrease the number of germs they were bringing into the house. Their overnight bags were taken into the main bedroom as well – they were trying to limit how much exposure Christopher had to the outside world while the pandemic was raging.

Eddie made a face, shaking his head. "Long day. There was a fire at a mansion in Bel Air this afternoon; the place went up like a tinderbox and we couldn't get the fire under control. Thankfully nobody was hurt, but I'm exhausted."

"You want to eat first or shower?"

"Shower," he replied, flashing Buck a tired grin. "He's asleep, isn't he?"

"Yeah, for about twenty minutes."

Eddie grimaced. "Okay. I'll just stick my head in."

Buck left Eddie to clean up and re-heated his dinner for him, pouring a couple of glasses of water. Eddie emerged about fifteen minutes later, still damp from his shower, and sank into his seat at the table in the kitchen. Buck set a plate of chicken and vegetables in front of him, poured some gravy on top, and took the seat across from him.

They didn't speak for a few minutes; Eddie too busy shovelling food into his mouth – but when he finally slowed down and had a sip of water, he gave Buck a long, grateful look. "Thanks for this. I needed it."

"That's okay, man. That's what I'm here for."

"Yeah, but I feel guilty; you must be tearing your hair out bored."

Buck shook his head with a shrug. "Actually, I'm kinda liking it," he admitted, laughing when Eddie raised his eyebrows skeptically at him. "No, I mean… I always wanted kids, and this is like… I get to pretend to be a dad for a while. It's nice."

"Pretend? You've been helping me raise Christopher ever since we met," Eddie pointed out. "You're like a second father to him. He doesn't call you Uncle Buck, you know. You're more than an uncle."

He shook his head, embarrassed. "No."

"Yeah, you are. You're… so fucking important to me, Buck," he said, letting out a breath of air. "You're just… after Christopher, you're the most important person in my life."

He had a lump in his throat that he couldn't quite explain. "I am?"

"Yeah." Eddie met his eyes. "You know with that train derailment—"

"Oh god, do we have to go over that again?"

"No, just listen. I was really pissed off that day."

Buck snorted. "Uh yeah, I remember. Vividly."

Eddie grinned, and then lifted his shoulders. "She doesn't know you, man. She… let you go. Like… I knew from day one that you're different. And you were a dick to me and I still just… wanted you to like me. I just really want you to like me, Buck."

He wanted to make a joke about Eddie being tired – his defences were always lowered when he was worn out - but he said instead, "I do like you. You're my best friend in the world."

He nodded, his nose scrunching before he murmured, "I'm… not good at talking about stuff, but I always like talking to you. I'm really glad you decided to stay. Honestly, I couldn't have gone months without being able to talk to you like we always do."

"I'm here for you, Eds," Buck murmured. "You know that."

"Ditto." Eddie had another mouthful of food, chewed, and then said, "Did you talk to Maddie?"

He nodded. "We Facetimed this afternoon; she was as cryptic as usual."

"Pregnant," Eddie said knowingly.

"Maybe. She seems really happy."

"Yep, pregnant. She must be waiting to pass the twelve-week mark before telling people." Eddie had another mouthful of chicken, raising his eyebrows at him.

He nodded. "She asked about you; how we're going. She didn't believe me when I told her everything was good."

Eddie grinned, and then shrugged. "They thought we'd be at each other's throats by now, but honestly, we're seeing each other less than we were before… except we are sharing a bed, so…"

"Well, nobody knows about that. Speaking of – Eddie, we gotta do something about your toenails. I mean it. I'm being serious."

"Excuse me?" Eddie asked, aghast.

"You kicked me in the middle of the night again, and it looks like I got into a fight with a cat and lost," Buck said bluntly. "Dude, how are you cutting your toenails? With an axe?"

Eddie's jaw was hanging open. " _Excuse me?_ "

"You heard me. You want me to give you a pedicure?"

"Excuse me?!" he practically squawked, looking down at his feet. "Buck!"

"Yeah, well, I stand by it," Buck remarked. "Look at your toes, dude. Sit down with me on the couch and I'll sort it out for you."

"Are you fucking serious?" Eddie hissed.

"Deadly fucking serious – look at my leg!" he protested, yanking up his pant leg to show the scratches. "That's all you, dude. Look at those claws you've got there. I've got supplies; I'm going to take care of it for you. Finish your dinner."

Eddie's mouth was still hanging open, in a total state of shock. "You want to give me a pedicure?"

"Yeah, well, sorta. I take care of my own feet," he said, holding out his leg so Eddie could see. "You've got some real gnarly claws going on there, bud. I'll look after it for you."

Eddie leaned in and whispered, "Is this a foot fetish?"

Buck snorted. "No? It's a fetish of me not having my legs cut up every time you kick me in the middle of the night."

Eddie made a face. "You're not cutting my toenails," he said bluntly. "End of discussion."

~

Twenty minutes later, Buck had Eddie's feet in his lap, sitting on the end of the bed with his supplies and a towel to protect the doona cover. Eddie was glowering at him, watching suspiciously as Buck carefully clipped his nails. He had produced an ancient, blunt pair of toenail clippers of his own, which Buck had immediately tossed it in the bin, ignoring his protests.

They were silent, Eddie leaning back on his hands but watching intently, seemingly having succumbed to his fate. Buck finished his nails, and poured some foot cream onto his hands, slathering it on his left foot first. He dug his thumbs into the arch of his foot, massaging the cream into his skin.

"Oh my god, are you fucking kidding me," Eddie said in a rush, dropping his head back. "Jesus Christ, _Buck._ "

Buck smirked at him. "Been awhile?"

"You think?" Eddie had given up the fight and was leaning into Buck's touch, sprawled across the bed. "Holy fuck. Do you do this to the women you date?"

"This? No." Buck continued massaging his foot, gazing at him fondly. "I just take care of my own feet."

"So you don't give foot massages as like a sex thing or---"

"You want to have sex, Eds?" he asked dryly.

Eddie's head popped up with alarm. "No?"

Buck grinned at him. "I don't know man, I'm just one bro giving another bro the best foot massage of his life. You're the one who keeps talking about sex."

"This feels sexual to me," Eddie complained, but groaned when Buck switched to the other foot.

"Well, it's been so long since you had sex, any touch probably feels sexual," Buck teased.

"How do you know when I last had sex?" he demanded.

"I know it was before Shannon died. You on Tinder, Eddie?"

"No," Eddie complained, but he was practically boneless beneath Buck's touch, having completely given in. "It's been like… a year. Not the longest I've ever gone without."

"When you guys separated?" he guessed.

"Yeah, that was over two years, nearly three." Eddie looked up at him. "I'm fine though. I don't need it."

"Oh sure," Buck replied, and deliberately slid his hands up Eddie's leg, massaging his calf. "It's nice though."

Eddie was quiet for a moment, and then murmured, "I don't… have sex for the sake of having sex. Like… that's not… um… it's not about that, for me. But I know it's different for you."

"What do you mean?" Buck asked curiously.

"I don't sleep with people I don't have an emotional connection with," he admitted. "Because… I don't know. It's dumb."

Buck dug his thumbs into the bottom of Eddie's foot again, and said, "Try me."

"Um…" Eddie pursed his lips, and then said, "It might sound arrogant."

"You're the least arrogant guy I've ever met," Buck said honestly.

Eddie grimaced. "Yeah, but… I know that I’m handsome," he said, embarrassed. "Like, I know… I know that."

"Yeah, you are," Buck agreed, switching feet again. "You want me to stop?"

"No, keep going." Eddie propped himself up on his elbow again, gazing at Buck. "When I was in high school, and I started having sex when I was sixteen, I… didn't have a steady girlfriend, but I had all these girls chasing after me, and after a while I kind of felt like… a piece of meat. Like nobody was really interested in me. I know it's dumb."

"It's not dumb," Buck replied. "You're allowed to not want to sleep around. If you don't like it, don’t do it."

"Yeah, but… there's another thing," Eddie said nervously. "I um… I was never really attracted to girls."

Buck stopped, tilting his head to the side, gazing at him curiously. "What do you mean? Like, asexual, or…"

"No, I'm… I'm more… interested in men, I guess," he confessed, unable to meet Buck's eyes. "I just never acted on it. Ever. Shannon had no idea."

Buck stopped what he was doing, totally dumbfounded. "Are you coming out to me, Eds?" He'd had absolutely no idea. _None._

Eddie shrugged, visibly terrified. "Maybe. I never told anyone before, but… I trust you."

"Is that why you never dated anyone after you and Shannon separated?" he asked, because holy shit, that explained _a lot_.

"Yeah, but I didn't have time to worry about it, either. I was working three jobs." Eddie picked at the duvet cover, clearly nervous and uncertain about his revelation. "Does it change things?"

"No, not at all," Buck replied, examining Eddie's feet again. "You know I'm bi. I'm fine with it."

Eddie nodded slowly. "And you… came out. Everyone knows."

"Yeah, well, I didn't see much point in keeping it a secret. It's not like I'm ashamed of it – and you shouldn't be either," he said firmly. "It's time you started living life on your own terms, Eds. Find what you're looking for and what will make you happy."

"You really think so?" he asked hesitantly. "Is it… selfish to want to date? Like, I should just focus on Christopher."

"Christopher is nearly ten," Buck replied, rubbing circles with his thumbs in the soles of Eddie's feet. "He's growing up so fast, and… he wouldn't want you to be lonely. You know that."

Eddie nodded thoughtfully. "You're right."

"I usually am." Buck lifted Eddie's right foot up to examine it. "You've got a callus. I'll order some stuff to remove it in my next Amazon shop. There's also these foot masks you can get to remove dry, dead skin – I'm going to get a pack of those for you as well. We can do it together. It's wild, Eddie – you can practically peel your skin off. You're gonna love it."

Eddie had a look of horror on his face. "I don't think I will."

"Trust me." Buck patted his feet. "All done. That'll be fifty bucks."

"Yeah, yeah," Eddie retorted, but sat up, examining his feet. "You've done a nice job."

"Thank you." Buck handed him a pair of socks. "Put these on. All I want in return is those spicy enchiladas for dinner on Sunday night. Like your Abuela makes, you know?"

Eddie smiled gratefully at him. "Can do."

"Good." Buck tucked his supplies back into their little bag and stood up, collecting the towel and making sure he hadn't left any clippings behind. He went into the bathroom to clean up, and when he returned, Eddie was already under the covers, sleeping soundly.

Buck slid in beside him and flicked the light off, turning on his side to face him. So Eddie wasn't entirely straight – but hadn't he wondered about that before? The man had only ever shown interest in Shannon and then, briefly, for one of Christopher's teachers. He never mentioned dating. He objected any time somebody suggested he put himself out there, and the day Chimney had suggested he set up a Tinder profile, Eddie had looked so appalled and offended that Chimney had immediately apologised to him.

Setting aside everything else, Buck had always wondered if there was the slightest spark between them, that maybe Eddie was single because Buck was single… and Eddie had asked him to move in, he'd suggested sharing the bed, he let Buck get away with murder… and even now, in his sleep, he'd moved closer as if acting on instinct.

Buck felt a stirring of hope in the pit of his stomach. Maybe? Just… maybe?

If he was honest with himself, it was the only thing he'd wanted from the very first day they'd met. Eddie was… _everything._ He couldn't imagine anything better than possibly being his boyfriend one day – that wouldn't be a one-night-stand kind of at thing. It would be _real._

The thought kept him awake, buzzing around in his brain. The possibilities were _endless._

~~

It was a bright and sunny Thursday morning in Los Angeles, and despite everything that was happening in the world, Eddie was in a good mood. He climbed the stairs to the kitchen at the station and was greeted enthusiastically by Chimney – who was uncharacteristically cheerful in the morning – and less happily by Hen, who was nursing a cup of coffee with her head on her hand.

"What's going on?" he asked with concern, taking a seat beside her at the table. "You okay?"

She just shook her head at him. "The kids are going stir-crazy and Karen and I are losing our minds," she said, adjusting the mask over her mouth. "How are you and Buck going?"

"So far, so good," he replied, as Chimney set a fresh cup of coffee down in front of him and took the seat opposite Hen. "Thanks, man. Yeah, we're good. Buck likes being a pretend stay-at-home-dad, I think."

"We were placing bets on when you'd kill him," Chimney said dryly, lifting his mask to sip his coffee. "I thought you would've done it by now. I distinctly remember what he was like as a roommate."

"Buck wouldn't do that to Eddie," Hen pointed out. "He likes Eddie more than you."

Chimney's eyes widened. "Take that back."

"Nope, it's the truth," she said gleefully. "I bet he's been on his best behaviour. Is he sleeping on your couch?"

"It's a futon, and yeah," he lied. "His feet hang off the end, but he hasn't complained about it. Christopher's loving it. Buck's baking is going to make us all fat."

"See, this sounds blissful," Chimney complained. "I'm stuck with my brother."

"And Maddie," Hen said bluntly.

"Yeah, but Maddie takes Albert's side a lot more than I'm comfortable with."

They both laughed, and Eddie was sipping his coffee when Hen said to him, "I'm glad it's working out. Buck wouldn't have been happy anywhere else. I'm guessing he asked you, right?"

Eddie shook his head. "I needed help with Christopher and he was the first person I thought of. Carla's busy, and it's too much of a risk for her to be around Chris at the moment. My Abuela is high-risk, Pepa is an essential worker… my sisters are in El Paso and my parents… wanted Christopher to stay with them but it's no safer for him in El Paso than it is here. I thought Buck and I could work our schedules so that one of us could be home with him, but Buck suggested taking the time off and it made sense to me."

"You two really have become your own little family, huh," Chimney commented. "I know how much Christopher loves Buck."

"Yeah, he's a great guy. The best friend I ever had," Eddie said with a shrug. "It's working out really well."

~

If he was honest with himself – and he tried not to be too introspective at the best of times – he was still coming to terms with how he'd so easily come out to Buck. He could put it down to the fact that he was weakened by the foot massage, or that it had just slipped out, but the truth was that he'd wanted Buck to know. He had to put the truth out there, let it sit for a while, and then find out how Buck was feeling about it.

Eddie wouldn't have let just anyone move into his house and his bed; he wouldn't have let just anyone take care of him the way Buck so easily and willingly did. He was looking at it like a trial run for a possible relationship – they live together, they sleep together, and maybe… fall in love?

Or maybe he was in already in love; he wasn't sure. What he was sure about was _Buck_ , and how much he needed and wanted him to stay. How much he liked sharing a bed with him and waking up next to him in the morning. How nice it was to be taken care of for a change.

Buck had been so unbelievably easy-going about it – it didn't seem to faze him at all. He'd been right there beside Eddie when he awoke, on his side, one hand on Eddie's bicep. He liked to move around in his sleep, and often Eddie would awake to find some part of Buck touching him. He liked it. It was nice sharing a bed with someone again.

He'd worked up the courage to tell Buck he wasn't one hundred percent straight, and all he needed to do was work up the courage to ask him out… well, they couldn't go out, so… he had to tell him how he felt. It didn't help that he found himself falling hopelessly in love with the guy the longer they spent together – maybe it was the way Christopher looked at Buck, like he was the most incredible person on the planet, or the way Buck slotted in as surrogate father and took care of what needed to be done.

Or maybe it was the little projects that Buck had completed around the house, like the vegetable patch, or fixing up the bathroom and organising the kitchen, or buying Eddie a brand new freaking bed out of the goodness of his heart. Maybe it was having someone to come home and have an adult conversation with after work, or the fact that Buck's cooking was almost as good as Bobby's – his bread skills were especially superior.

But maybe the reason he was falling in love so quickly and completely was due to their nightly ritual – once Christopher was asleep, they'd eat some dessert together in front of the TV, brush their teeth together in the bathroom, and slide into bed together, where they'd talk until they were both nodding off to sleep.

Eddie _loved it._ He'd been on his own for so long that just having someone in bed with him was a thrill, but the fact that it was _Buck_ was just the icing on the cake. Nobody had ever made him feel heard and understood the way Buck did. He and Shannon had been unable to communicate, but he didn't have that problem with Buck, who lay in bed beside him and listened like Eddie was the most fascinating person on the planet.

And sometimes he wondered if it was just one-sided, if these feelings that were bubbling up inside him were reciprocated at all – maybe Buck was feeling the same way? Hopefully?

~

When Eddie crawled into bed beside him on Thursday night, Buck was texting with Maddie. "She's still being cryptic," he murmured.

"Yeah, Chimney didn't say anything today either, and Hen was asking him questions. She's pretty sure Maddie is pregnant as well." Eddie stuffed a pillow under his head and turned to face him, face to face with his skull tattoo. He poked it with a finger, pursing his lips, and said, "What was this for?"

Buck glanced at him, and then lifted his arm. "I was drunk," he admitted. "I got it when I was in Brazil."

"Oh." Eddie knew there were more tattoos, scattered across his chest, but he couldn't help but touch the black armband and murmur, "And this one?"

"I just liked it. It kinda matches yours." Buck flashed him a grin. "Why'd you get yours?"

"I don't know."

"'Find a way'?" he asked, raising his eyebrows. "There's a story behind that."

Eddie held up his wrist, examining the tattoo with a frown. "It's a reminder."

"Of what?" Buck set his phone down on the table, turning to face him curiously.

"That… I shouldn't just give up if things are rough," he murmured. "That I need to keep going. Find a way."

Buck smiled at him. "That's you, though. That's who you are."

"Sometimes I don't think so."

"What are you talking about? You're a fighter. You always fight for what you want; who you love…" Buck trailed off. "It's a good thing."

"It's not if the person you love doesn't love you back," he said without thinking, and Buck's eyebrows lifted. "I'm talking about Shannon. Because… I loved her, even though… despite what I told you."

"Yeah, I know you did," Buck murmured. "I remember."

"But I look back and I think… it wasn't right; maybe it was never right. Maybe I was fooling myself. You know, Adriana's on the verge of getting divorced and Sophia's had god knows how many relationships by now, and… my parents fight, a lot, even though they think we don't know that… and I think, maybe it's not real, you know. The perfect relationship. Falling in love; all that shit."

Buck gave him a sad look. "Don't say that," he murmured.

"You want a wife and a family of your own," Eddie said quietly.

He shrugged. "I want… I don't know. I want a family; somewhere I belong. Right now I'm just leeching off you."

He grimaced, propping himself up. "Leeching? What do you mean?"

"Just… getting to stay here with you and Chris, pretending that I'm like, your house-husband or something…" Buck trailed off. "It's not real; it's going to end, and I'll go back to the loft on my own again."

_It doesn't have to end_ , he thought, but wasn't sure he had the courage to say the words out loud. "Buck, I don't feel that way at all, you know. I don't think you're leeching off me."

"You're too nice to me, Eddie," Buck said, smiling sadly at him. "You'll want to move on one day as well. You might meet a nice guy."

"I have—" he began to say, but was interrupted when he heard a shout from Christopher's room.

"DAD!"

The conversation instantly forgotten, Eddie was out of bed and down the hall in a flash, flicking on the hallway light and the overhead light in Christopher's bedroom. "What's wrong?" he asked, his heart pounding.

Christopher pointed a shaky finger at the ceiling. "Spider!"

Sure enough, an eight-legged critter was in the corner where the wall met the ceiling. Eddie had never admitted this particular fear to anyone, but he _hated_ spiders, especially creepy little brown ones that were right over his head. Was it a brown recluse? It looked like a brown recluse.

"Buck," he called, but Buck was already in the doorway. "Can you… I can't reach it."

Buck narrowed his eyes at him suspiciously. "You can't reach it, or you don't want to reach it?"

"I'm shorter than you," he said quickly.

"Right." Buck eyed him, trying not to grin, and disappeared again.

Eddie glanced up at the spider warily, just hanging out in the corner of the room like it lived there. Christopher was buried under the covers, but when Buck marched back in with a broom and a rolled-up newspaper, he peeked out. Eddie joined him on the bed, handing him his glasses so he could watch as Buck effortlessly swept the spider off the wall and smacked it with the newspaper.

"That was hard," he said to Eddie sarcastically. "Really difficult."

"That's why I got you to do it," Eddie said reasonably.

"Uh huh." Buck left the room again, returning a few moments later with some tissues, and cleaned up the remnants of the spider. "All done, Chris. Safe and sound."

But Christopher was clinging to Eddie, and he whispered, "Can I sleep in your room tonight?"

~~

Buck returned to the bedroom, after having done a thorough spider-check of the rest of the house, wondering if he should sleep in Christopher's bed for the night. He paused in the doorway, gazing in at them, about to speak, when he realised Eddie had already turned down his side of the bed for him.

Well, obviously he was expecting him to join them, so he did, padding around the bed and sliding in beside them. Christopher was tucked against Eddie's chest, with both of Eddie's arms wrapped around him securely. Buck perched on the edge of the bed and gazed at them for a moment, until Eddie opened his eyes, blinking up at him sleepily.

_I love you_ , he thought clearly, but smiled at him instead. "Comfy?"

Eddie returned his smile, nodding sleepily. "Bedtime," he murmured, reaching out to pat Buck's side of the bed. "Sleep."

Buck lay down and reached over to flick off the light, turning on his side away from them, trying not to panic. The love feeling – god, it had come on suddenly, taking his breath away. And really, it wasn't a bad thing, because Eddie wasn't straight – he'd told Buck as much; he'd wanted him to know.

_He'd wanted him to know._

It was like the pieces of the puzzle were finally falling into place. Eddie wanted him to stay; Eddie wanted to share a bed; Eddie trusted him with Christopher more than anyone else; Eddie didn't sleep around; Eddie wasn't straight… Eddie was in love with Buck.

And Buck was in love with Eddie.

_Holy shit._

He felt a hand brush against his back, and turned his head slightly.

"What are you doing?" Eddie murmured. "Where are you?" He was half-asleep, voice groggy.

They always fell asleep facing each other. Always.

Buck had a lump in his throat as he rolled over to face them. Eddie's hand wrapped around his wrist – his eyes were closed, head resting atop Christopher's.

"Hey Eddie," Buck whispered, and Eddie made a little noise of recognition. "Do you love me?"

"Mmmhmm."

"I love you too."

"Hmm?" Eddie opened his eyes, blinking at him sleepily. "You do?"

"Yeah, in case you've been… trying to tell me."

Even in the darkness he could see the slow smile spread across Eddie's face. "Yeah, I have."

"Now you don't have to." Buck leaned over, hesitating only a moment before brushing his lips against Eddie's in a first, tentative kiss.

He felt Eddie smile beneath him, the hand on his wrist tightening. "Mmm."

Buck kissed him again and then moved back, gazing at him adoringly. "You're so cute. You could've just told me."

"Wanted you to tell me first," Eddie murmured.

"Kinda wish you'd told me sooner. We've been wasting time."

"But you're staying, so we have time."

Buck extended a hand, brushing his fingers through Eddie's hair. "Yeah, we do."

Eddie's head bobbed in the slightest of nods, as he drifted into a deep sleep, his lips still curved in a smile. Buck shifted even closer to them, sharing Eddie's pillow, resting a hand on his hip, Christopher nestled securely between them.

Like it was meant to be.

~

He awoke the next morning to find Christopher between them, still asleep with his mouth open, and Eddie laying on his side, awake, a smile playing on his lips. "Did I dream that last night?" he asked, a little nervously.

Buck shook his head, stretching his arms out and yawning. "No."

Eddie grinned. "Wow."

"Yeah. Too bad we won't get another night together until Sunday." Buck arched his eyebrows at him, as Christopher began to stir, blinking awake slowly. "Also, your kid takes up a lot of space."

"Yeah, and I was boiling hot most of the night too," Eddie complained, reaching over to tickle Christopher's ribs. "Come on, mister. You've had your fun."

Christopher giggled, wriggling away from Eddie and over to Buck. "Nooooo."

"Maybe I'll just have to teach you how to kill spiders," Buck said loftily, and Christopher let out a groan. "No?"

"No, they're scary." He popped his head up, smiling at them both. "I like the bed."

"Yeah, so do we," Eddie replied as he pulled Christopher back into his arms again, smacking kisses to his cheek. "Come on, little man. You've got to get up. Just because you and Buck are at home all day doesn't mean you get to sleep in."

"Aw," Christopher complained, exchanging a sneaky glance with Buck – because sometimes they had naps in the middle of the day. Eddie didn't need to know about that.

Buck was feeling like he was on cloud nine as he made breakfast for them – he and Eddie couldn't stop smiling at each other. It was easy to shift from feeling like Eddie was just his friend to _something more_ ; that this relationship could possibly be the most important of his life.

While Christopher was setting up for school, Buck followed Eddie to the front door, leaning against the wall as he slipped into his jacket. "Sunday night," he said, raising his eyebrows.

Eddie nodded. "Sunday night." He sounded as nervous and excited as Buck felt.

"Be safe out there today."

"I will." Eddie squeezed his hand lightly, and then leaned in to brush a kiss to his lips. "I'll be in touch."

Buck couldn't wipe the grin from his face. "Okay."

"Okay." Eddie went to step away, his eyes still trained on Buck, and then pulled him in for another, firmer kiss, sliding his arm around his shoulders. Buck leaned into it, pulling him close, savouring every single second of it – from the way Eddie tasted to how he felt in his arms, to the brief touch of their tongues, the promise of something more. It was the best kiss of his life.

"Wow," Eddie murmured, letting out a breath, his eyes lingering on Buck's lips. "Wow, wow, wow. Okay. I gotta go."

"You could call in sick."

"Then they'll make me get a Covid test…" Eddie shook his head. "I can't. I gotta go. Kiss me again."

So Buck did, pushing him up against the door, sliding his tongue along Eddie's lower lip. They only broke apart when Christopher called, "Buck, the computer won't connect!"

Buck pulled away, letting out a sigh. "I'll see you tonight briefly."

"I'll text you." Eddie lingered a moment longer, staring up at him. "Wow."

"Yeah," Buck whispered. "Fucking _wow._ "

~


	2. Chapter 2

True to his word, Eddie texted him constantly throughout the day, and as they briefly crossed paths as Buck was leaving for work that night, they shared one more kiss before Buck had to leave.

He was working with Hen the following morning, catching up over coffee in the kitchen before the alarms sounded. He told her all about Christopher's Zoom school, and how he'd taken up baking, and couldn't help but gush about great things were going.

"So you and Eddie aren't sick of each other yet?" she asked, grinning beneath her mask. "I was honestly surprised he asked you for help. I thought he'd rely on his grandmother."

"She's high risk, and he didn't want to be separated from Christopher. And I could take the time off," Buck said with a shrug, sipping his coffee.

"You're not going stir crazy?"

"No… well, yeah. A bit. It's better when Christopher is in school because I can listen to that; it keeps me entertained, but… I've been searching for stuff to do, so I've been fixing things around the house and baking, a lot. We ordered some puzzles from Amazon so we usually sit and work on the dinosaur one for an hour in the afternoon; it's a thousand pieces and boring as hell but Christopher likes it."

"Eddie hasn't said much, other than mentioning that it was going well." She eyed him. "Where are you sleeping?"

"Futon," he replied. "In the living room."

"Ah. Maddie said you'd bought a new bed; I wondered if it was for Eddie's house."

Shit. "Um… yep."

Hen frowned. "You bought Eddie a new bed?" she clarified, leaning in close.

Buck shrugged. "Yep."

"For… what reason?"

"His was terrible."

"So you're sharing the bed with him?"

"No, I'm on the futon," he insisted.

Hen set her cup of coffee down on the table, her eyes narrowed suspiciously. "You just buy your friends beds now?"

Buck shrugged. "I bought _Eddie_ a bed," he clarified. "He's my best friend."

"Yeah, I love Chim, but I'm not buying him a bed. There's something going on with you two and I'm going to figure it out." Hen gave a definitive nod as the alarms began to sound. "Here we go."

~

They were out of the station most of the day – a car accident in Santa Monica in the morning, followed by a kitchen fire at a restaurant in the city. In the afternoon were called to Lake Piru, where a pleasure craft was in the midst of sinking, and a family of ten were hanging on for dear life.

Buck boarded a zodiac with Hen and the rest of the team and headed out, taking in the scene for the first time. It was a speedboat, over capacity, very low in the water. A group of children were balanced precariously on the bow, and the rest – a mix of adults and teenagers - were in the stern, their arms over their heads, waving for help. Some were in life vests, others weren't – but most importantly, three of the four children on the bow were without.

Reynolds was acting captain for the day, and he ordered their boat pull alongside the stricken vessel. "We'll get the kids first!" he called to the adults, but the bow swung away from them, and the stern began to take on more water. They'd obviously crashed into something submerged – there was a hole in the fibreglass hull, and scrapes along the side of the boat. The group in the stern shifted, and the boat began to list ominously.

Screaming, several adult males and teenagers began to leap into the water, swimming over to their boat, ignoring the shouts from the rescue team to wait. Another zodiac was on the way, but the currents in the lake were notoriously strong, and the victims were already struggling to reach their boat.

Buck had his eyes on the group of children on the bow, who were clinging to each other. There was a boy in a green shirt, who looked to be the oldest, around Christopher's age, and three little ones who were all around five or six. The boat listed dangerously to port, and the children struggled to stay on the bow as the stern sank lower into the water.

"Buck, you're the strongest swimmer - go," Reynolds ordered him, and without hesitation he dived off the side of the boat and swam purposefully towards the stricken vessel. Before he could reach them, two of the children without life vests fell into the water on the starboard side, nearest to him, and the two remaining on board screamed hysterically.

He couldn't worry about the two on the boat; he had to rescue the boy in the green shirt and the girl with blonde pigtails. He saw a small head pop out of the water for a moment before disappearing under again, and he took a huge gulp of air before diving beneath the surface of the lake. Both kids were struggling underwater in the strong current, but the girl was closest to him, and he was able to wrap an arm around her easily. He kicked as hard as he could, managing to grab the boy in the green t-shirt by the arm.

Buck began kicking for the surface, with both children in his grasp, but it was then that he realised the boat had begun its rapid descent to the bottom. They were too fucking close – the suction from the boat ripped the oldest child from his hand, dragging him down with it, arms outstretched, mouth open in a silent scream. The boy in the green t-shirt disappeared into the murky depths of the lake.

Buck had a little girl in his arms that had been under for way too long, and his lungs were burning. He made the decision to kick for the surface desperately, breaking through with a huge gasp of air. The zodiac swung in towards him, Hen leaning over the side with her hands held out, and he passed the child up to her before gulping in some air and diving down again, kicking determinedly for the bottom of the lake.

The boy in the green shirt was gone.

He searched until he thought he might drown, and then broke through the surface for some air, ignoring Hen screaming at him to get back on the boat, before diving back down again. He searched and searched, desperately, surfacing for air over and over, until Reynolds finally hauled him out of the water and forced him to stop.

And Buck collapsed in the bottom of the boat, physically exhausted, and sobbed uncontrollably.

~~

Eddie's phone rang about 6pm that evening, as he was busy figuring out what to have for dinner. He answered it absently, puzzling over the contents of the fridge. "Hey, Hen."

"Eddie, this is a courtesy call – Buck had a rough one this afternoon, and the captain sent him home."

"What happened?" he asked with concern, letting the fridge door swing shut.

"A boy drowned. Buck tried to save him, but…" she trailed off, sounding close to tears. "He's devastated, Eddie. I'm just warning you."

"Thanks," he replied, pressing a hand to his head. "Okay. I'll be ready for him."

"He's been told to take tomorrow as well, so don't let him try to come to work, okay?"

"Okay, I won't. Thanks for letting me know," he said gratefully. "Are you okay?"

She let out a bitter laugh. "Honestly, that scene today… what a fucking shitshow, Eddie. You've never seen anything like it. Those poor kids were just left to fend for themselves. We've got video of the full rescue – I'll show you on Monday. It was awful."

"Buck's not hurt, is he?" he asked worriedly.

"No, he's exhausted. He dove down, over and over… so many times. He must've held his breath for two minutes—" her voice cut out, and Eddie could tell she was trying to control her emotions. "I was so worried he wasn't going to surface again. He tried so hard to save him. I know he was reliving the tsunami… I could just tell, from the look on his face. That same haunted look he had when we found him at the VA Hospital. You remember."

He had a lump in his throat. "Yeah, I do. Jesus."

"So you'll take care of him, right Eddie? He'll be okay with you?"

"I will," he promised. "Don't worry. He's in good hands with us."

"I know. I just… I've never seen him so distraught. We sent him home in an Uber. None of us trusted him to drive."

Eddie wandered out to the living room, peering out the windows. "Okay, I'll keep an eye out for him."

"Good. Hey, quick question, changing the subject – did he really buy you a new bed?"

_Evan Buckley._ Eddie gritted his teeth and said, "Uh, yeah. He was making fun of me, and I told him I couldn't afford it right now, so he just went and did it, the bastard."

"He loves you too much, Eddie," Hen said affectionately.

He couldn't help but smile at that. "Yeah, well. I wouldn't have asked anyone else to stay here, put it that way." Headlights illuminated the living room, and he said quickly, "He's here, Hen. I'll talk to you next week, okay?"

"Okay, Eddie. Say hi to Christopher for me."

"Will do." Eddie ended the call, hurrying out to the living room where Christopher was watching TV. "Hey buddy, Buck's had a hard day, all right? So we're going to take care of him tonight."

Christopher nodded seriously. "Okay. What should I do?"

"Just be prepared for Buck to be sad," Eddie said, watching as Buck trudged up the walkway to the house, his mask hanging off his face. "He's had a really bad day."

"Okay," Christopher said again, looking worried.

Eddie ruffled his hair and went to the door, pulling it open so Buck wouldn't have to unlock it. Buck stopped in his tracks and gave Eddie a haunted look. "Hen called you," he said dully.

"Yeah, she did," he replied. "Let me take your stuff."

Buck's lips were trembling as he passed his bag and keys to Eddie, before taking a seat to undo his boots. "I can't talk about it yet."

"That's okay. What can I do to help?"

"I don't know. I just can't talk right now." Buck struggled with the laces on his boots, finally undoing them and kicking his shoes off. He lined them up beside Eddie's on the stoop and stood, biting back tears as he stepped past Eddie and into the house.

"Hey Buck," Christopher called from the couch. "You want to watch TV with me?"

Buck stopped, unable to resist Christopher. "Um… I'm going to have a shower, bud," he said hoarsely, "and then I'll come back out, okay?"

"Okay. We can watch whatever you want," Christopher offered sweetly.

Buck nodded, biting hard on his trembling lips, trying not to cry. "Thanks." The tears came as soon as they were in the main bedroom, and Buck turned, met Eddie's eyes, and began to weep. "I tried – I really, really tried," he said haltingly. "I tried, I had him… I had my hand on him, and then…"

Eddie closed the door, pulling him into an embrace, tucking his head against his neck. "You tried your best."

"He was Christopher's age, Eddie, I can't… I can see his face…" Buck was shaking, clutching Eddie so tightly that there would almost definitely be bruises. "I couldn't – he was gone, I couldn't… I couldn't see him anymore, and I… he was wearing a green shirt, and…"

"I'm so sorry," Eddie said in his ear, as Buck sagged against him with grief. "I'm so, so sorry. I'm sorry this happened to you."

"I couldn't save him," Buck said helplessly.

"You tried, Buck. That's all you could do."

"I wasn't enough."

Eddie _felt that_ , like a punch to the stomach. He held Buck as tightly as he could and said fiercely, "You _tried_. There was nothing else you could do."

"Oh god, I feel so… I hate this; I don't want to feel like this, when… I was so happy, and now…" Buck was crying again, his tears dampening Eddie's shirt. "Oh _god._ I kept… I was in the tsunami again, Eddie, I was… oh god, I was… trying to find Christopher, and…"

"He's here; he's right here with us," Eddie said soothingly. "You saved him. Sit down, okay? Sit down."

Buck was still crying as Eddie sat him on the bed and knelt in front of him, his hands on his knees. He had no idea how to help other than to be as comforting as possible, so he found the softest, most worn pair of sweats in his cupboard, gently coaxed Buck into the bathroom and waited while he had a shower. He then wrapped him up in a fluffy towel and dried him off before helping him dress, and leading him back out to the hallway.

Buck had stopped crying, but his eyes were puffy and red, a haunted expression on his face.

"You must be hungry," Eddie said to him, resting his hands on his shoulders. "Do you want to come and sit with Christopher for a while? I'll make mac and cheese for dinner, with bacon on top, just how you like it."

Buck's chin trembled. "Okay."

"Do you want something to drink?" Eddie wiped a stray droplet of water from his cheek, and pulled him in for a hug again. "I've got some whiskey."

"Maybe after dinner; my stomach is really empty. I'll probably puke if you give me that."

"Okay." Eddie rubbed his back again soothingly. "Come on."

He settled Buck on the couch with Christopher, and a plan to watch _The Avengers_. Eddie kept an eye on them from the kitchen as he cooked, and when he wandered out to watch part of the movie, he found Christopher seated comfortably in Buck's lap, leaning against him like it was his own personal throne, and Buck's head on his shoulder, staring blankly at the television.

Eddie decided they could eat on the couch, and he dished up the mac and cheese into bowls and carried them out to the living room. Christopher slid off Buck's lap and sat on the floor at the coffee table, his eyes trained on the television as he absently ate his dinner. Eddie sat beside Buck on the couch and made sure that he put some food in his stomach, even if he was almost completely checked-out.

Eddie wasn't really sure what to do. He hadn't been with Buck after the tsunami – he'd gone home with Maddie that night, and he'd hardly been able to look in Eddie's direction he was so wracked with guilt – and Buck hadn't been with him after he'd nearly drowned in a well, so… this was their first time taking care of each other after a trauma, and he didn't want to fuck it up.

He thought about what he'd wanted after the well and the fire-fight in Afghanistan – comfort, silence and to sleep. As soon as the movie was over, he tucked Christopher into bed with a promise to read double to him the next night, and then made sure Buck had brushed his teeth before settling him in bed as well. Eddie made sure the air-conditioning was on nice and cold, the curtains were closed so the room would be as dark as possible, and turned out the lights.

He slid into bed beside Buck and pulled him into an embrace, running his fingers up and down his spine. Buck draped an arm over his chest, his head on Eddie's shoulder. Eddie hoped the dark and silence would put him to sleep, but Buck whispered, "Eddie, do you think I'll ever stop feeling like this?"

He nodded. "Yes, you will."

"Have you ever… I've lost two people now, that I was trying to save," Buck said, gulping back tears. "And I think it's me."

"Both times, you did your best," Eddie whispered, rubbing his back.

"You weren't there for the rollercoaster."

"I know, but Bobby told me about it, and I know you did your best. I know you wouldn't have given up today until they had to rescue you as well. I know how much you care. I'm going to tell you what countless therapists have told me – you can take some time to feel this, and then you have to forgive yourself for the things you can't change. I'm right here, Buck. If you want me to take a few days off work to be with you, I will."

Buck lifted his head. "You would?" he asked hesitantly.

Eddie nodded. "Yeah, for you… I'll do whatever you want me to do. Anything you want."

Buck let out a breath. "I just want to stay in bed for a whole day."

"You can do that." Eddie kissed his forehead. "You can take as much time as you need."

~

Eddie spoke to Bobby on the phone on the Sunday night, arranging to take two days off work to keep an eye on Buck. True to his word, he'd been in bed all day, but he hadn't been alone – Eddie made a nest in the bedroom, and he and Christopher camped out with Buck while he slept, watching movies on the iPad.

"I might stop by," Bobby said towards the end of their conversation. "I won't come inside, but I just want to chat to him about everything, and make sure he's okay. Even with this lockdown, I can still arrange for him to speak to a therapist."

"He's told me absolutely no therapists under any circumstances," Eddie replied, as he put away clean dishes in the cupboards.

Bobby sighed. "Not all therapists are going to want to have sex with him."

Eddie chuckled. "It's not that… well, it's probably partly that, I don't know. He doesn't want to talk about himself with strangers. You know that."

"What about a priest?"

"A priest? God, no. Look, I'm here, and he and I can talk about anything. I know what happened. He just needs to feel it for a few days and then he can start moving on."

"As long as you're not giving him that terrible advice your father gave you," Bobby said wryly. "Don't tell him to suck it up."

Eddie was a little offended – he'd come a long way since then – but he said, "I know Buck better than you do. We've been living together for a month. I've got this."

"You two aren't on the verge of killing each other yet?"

He chuckled. "No, not at all. He's a great roommate and Christopher loves having him here. It's been a big adjustment for all of us but it's going well so far. He just misses seeing Maddie, most of all."

"Well, maybe we can arrange something there," Bobby murmured. "I'm pretty sure Chimney's hiding something from us."

"Ten bucks says she's pregnant."

Bobby laughed. "You're on."

~~

Buck awoke on Monday morning, later than usual, and found Eddie curled up beside him. It was 6.30am and the alarm hadn't sounded, so he shook Eddie awake, concerned. "You're late," he said, as Eddie blinked up at him sleepily. "You're going to be late for work."

"I took the day off. Today and tomorrow," Eddie murmured, his eyes drifting shut again. "No need for an alarm."

Buck relaxed, and lay back down beside him. "You're worried about me. You don't think I can be alone with Christopher?" he asked worriedly.

Eddie's eyes snapped open. "No," he said firmly. "I just wanted to be here if you needed me. That’s all."

Buck had been on the razor's edge of an emotional breakdown for the last forty-eight hours, and it took all his willpower not to crumble and break down crying again. He could only gaze gratefully at Eddie, who threw an arm over him in an awkward hug and kissed his cheek.

"This is not how I wanted this to go, by the way," Eddie said, his voice muffled. "I was kinda hoping you'd come home on Sunday night and we'd end up naked."

"I know, I wanted that too," he murmured, sliding his lips along Eddie's cheek. "I want you. Maybe you can fuck the sad right out of me."

"If that's what you want." Eddie lifted his head, smiling down at him, and pecked a kiss to his lips. His hair was longer than usual, and Buck pushed it off his forehead.

"You want me to cut your hair for you?"

"He does toenails, he does hair…" Eddie leaned in to peck a kiss to his lips. "You want to wax me as well?"

"Sack, back and crack?" Buck murmured into his ear, forgetting all about his grief the second Eddie snorted with laughter.

"No?!"

"You never had it done?" Buck cast a hand down Eddie's back and then up under his shirt, sliding his fingers across smooth skin for the first time.

Eddie shook his head. "No? Have you?"

Buck nodded with a smirk.

"No way," Eddie said disbelievingly.

"Yeah, I like to look good," Buck replied, rolling Eddie onto his back, and sliding on top of him. "So when you're down there… things are maintained."

"Really?" Eddie's eyebrows lifted. "Should I…"

"No, I don't mind, I know how hairy you are." Buck kissed him again, but an image of the drowning boy flashed into his mind, and he pulled away, shaking his head. "Fuck."

"What's wrong?" Eddie asked with concern, lifting his head.

"Sorry, I just…"

"It's too soon; I know. It's okay." Eddie sat up, pulling Buck in for a hug. "You're okay. I've got you."

Buck relaxed against him, closing his eyes. "I always knew this could happen," he said, swallowing his emotions, "but… it's happened twice now, and…"

"I know you know you did everything you could," Eddie murmured to him. "But I know how much it hurts."

"I had him, Eddie. I had him in my arms, I just… the current, and the suction, and…" he screwed his face up, flashing back to that awful moment. "I saw him sinking, and… I had to get the other kid to the surface, and when I came back, he was gone. He just vanished."

Eddie rubbed his back. "Look, we had that other rescue at the same lake, remember? Those currents are vicious, especially on a windy day. And Saturday was pretty windy."

"Yeah." Buck rested his chin on Eddie's shoulder, closing his eyes.

"And you already had one kid in your arms, and they weren't wearing life vests, were they?"

"No."

"You did the best you could under the circumstances," he said gently. "I know you feel responsible, but you and I both know the parents are the ones to blame in this case. I talked to Bobby; he told me how the kids weren't wearing life vests and they were sitting on the bow when the boat was sinking. They're responsible. Not you."

He nodded again. "It still hurts. He just reminded me so much of Christopher; when I was… trying to find him – when the tsunami ripped him out of my arms, and I just… all I could think about was getting him back. Jesus Christ."

Eddie's hand slid up and down his back soothingly. "You're okay. He's okay. You saved him, but you can't always save everyone. And that's the worst part of this job."

"Yep." He cleared his throat, lifting his head to find that Eddie was gazing at him tenderly, an expression Buck had only ever seen him direct at Christopher before. "Do you really love me, Eds?"

Eddie smiled, slowly and sweetly. "Oh, yeah," he said, caressing Buck's cheek. "I really do."

"You arranged this."

"Yeah, I did."

"You wanted me here with you and Chris."

"Yeah. I've been really lonely, and… falling in love with you for a really long time," he said quietly. "I was hoping you felt the same way."

Buck had never allowed himself to really feel it – the way he felt about Eddie and Christopher. How they were what he'd always wanted; a place to belong and call home. He'd seen Eddie soft and sweet before, usually only around Christopher, but not so open and vulnerable – all his feelings, laid bare. Buck remembered when he'd tried to be open with Shannon and she'd asked for a divorce; he knew how difficult it had been for Eddie to be honest.

And he wasn't afraid anymore, that what he was feeling wasn't reciprocated, so he said, "I do. Definitely. From day one. I just wasn't sure about you."

"Would you have said anything?" Eddie lay down against the pillows again, sliding his hand up and down Buck's arm – if it was an attempt at distracting him from his misery, it was working, and Buck lay down beside him.

He contemplated Eddie's question and then said, "You and Christopher mean so much to me. I just tried not to think about the love side of it."

"But you weren't dating."

"No." Buck gave him a long look. "I liked spending time with you guys."

Eddie played with his fingers, and then murmured, "Maybe when lockdown is over, we can go on a real date. We might have to wear masks, but…"

"You want to take me out?"

"Yep. I really do." Eddie smiled up at him. "I'm not really worried about the rest of it. It is what it is."

"You're not worried about your parents?"

He shrugged. "Not really. I don't care so much about what they think anymore. I think they're narcissists… we had a big fight earlier in the year, and… ever since then, I haven't cared as much."

The door to the bedroom swung open suddenly, and Christopher stepped inside, holding onto the doorframe for support, rubbing his eyes. "It's late," he said, totally confused. "What's going on?"

Buck checked the time and swung his legs over the side of the bed. "Yep. Time for breakfast, kiddo, and then school. Your first class is at 9am. Your dad's going to stay home with us today."

Christopher screwed his face up. "Can we still have our afternoon nap?"

Eddie sat up. "What afternoon nap?"

~

It was easy enough to distract himself with routine – once they were all showered and dressed, and breakfast was eaten, Buck sat down at the table with Christopher like he always did and listened in on his lesson, googling randomly on his own laptop. It made Christopher feel less alone and more focused if Buck was there with him, and he noticed Eddie watching them as he pottered around the house, looking for things to do.

Eddie decided he'd arrange lunch for them, and Buck was engrossed in a YouTube video about the Krakatoa volcanic eruption when the doorbell rang.

"It's for you, Buck," Eddie called. "It's Bobby."

Bobby wasn't allowed in the house, so Buck set down his headphones, made sure Christopher was okay and went outside to greet him.

"Hey, Buck," Bobby said, smiling sadly at him. "Good to see you. I've missed having you around the station."

"Yeah, me too," he replied, ensuring to stay six feet apart. "How's Athena? The kids?"

"We're all fine. Athena's still on leave, and May's decided to hold off on college for now and possibly become a 911 dispatcher," he replied, raising his eyebrows. "So… there have been discussions about that, but she's motivated to do it, and I think she'll be great at it."

"For sure," Buck agreed, dreading the next topic of conversation. "Did Eddie show you the bread I've been baking?"

Bobby grinned. "He has, and he did suggest that you and I go head-to-head in bread baking, so… when we're all back at work together, you're on."

"I made a nice pumpernickel loaf last week," Buck murmured. "They loved it. Fresh out of the oven; I can hardly keep Eddie away from it. If you notice he's getting thick around the middle, that's why. Too much bread."

"He's keeping up his workouts, but he complains that you're not there to spot for him." Bobby tucked his hands in his pockets, his expression turning serious. "You know why I'm here."

Buck swallowed hard. "Yep. Am I in trouble?"

Looking surprised, Bobby shook his head vigorously. "God, no. I saw the video. The Chief saw the video. The police have been given the video and they will be pressing charges against the parents for negligence. The fact that you managed to save one of the kids was a miracle in itself."

Buck's face contorted before he could help himself. "I just couldn't hold onto him. The current was way too strong."

"Yes, it was." Bobby gazed at him sadly. "Buck, they located his body this morning. He was swept a few hundred yards away from the sinking. You had no chance."

Somehow, that wasn't comforting. "I should've swum further—"

"It wouldn't have helped, and we might have lost you as well. I saw how exhausted you were when they pulled you out of the water – in full gear, in water like that… Buck, you were lucky to escape with your life." Bobby tilted his head towards the house, and said in a low voice, "And you have a lot to lose now, don't you?"

Buck followed his gaze – he could see Eddie and Christopher through the windows, leaning over the computer together. "You know?" he asked, surprised.

"I know that he wouldn't have asked you to stay here without a damn good reason," Bobby replied, "and that he only has two bedrooms, and that he talks about you like you're his partner… and has done for the last two years. Plus the fact he's notoriously jealous any time anybody shows you attention, and he very nearly lost his cool at the train derailment multiple times, and that you're often the one person who can make him genuinely smile and laugh, and Christopher adores you—"

"Okay, okay," he interrupted with a weak chuckle. "Yep. Okay."

"You think I don't pay attention," Bobby said, tapping the side of his head, "but I see what's going on. Listen, Buck… setting that aside for now, I think you need to talk to Frank about this latest event. I'm not ordering you to do it – I know how you feel about therapy – but… I think it would do you some good. I imagine this might've brought up feelings about the tsunami as well, and I distinctly remember you actively avoiding therapy then."

Buck shrugged, shoving his hands into his pockets. "I just talk to Eddie."

"Eddie's not impartial," Bobby said imploringly.

"Cap, you know I hate therapy. I don't want to go. I've still got time off; I'll be okay." Buck paused, and then said, "But maybe if there's another water rescue, I need to sit it out."

"Whatever you want, Buck." Bobby checked his watch. "I've got to be getting back, but I just wanted to stop by and make sure you're all right."

He glanced over his shoulder at the house, to where Eddie and Christopher were seated at the table together, and said, "I think I'll be okay."

~

Buck returned to the house and took his usual seat opposite Christopher, flicking open his laptop. Christopher had a pair of headphones on, concentrating on the screen, so Eddie moved to sit beside Buck, sliding an arm around his shoulders. "You okay?"

He nodded. "I'll be all right."

"Good." Eddie patted his back. "Christopher is doing math, which is—"

"Boring. And surprisingly difficult," Buck finished for him. "It's nearly lunchtime. I'll make us some sandwiches."

"No, I'll do it, I can make sandwiches," Eddie objected good-naturedly. "What's on the schedule after lunch?"

"He usually does history in the afternoons, and lately it's been all about Ancient Greece, so I've been listening in and googling stuff," Buck replied. "And then when that's finished we usually have a nap."

"Yeah, I don't get the nap part of it? He hasn't needed a nap during the day since before he started school."

Buck shrugged. "I don't know what to tell you, Eds. It's a thing we do."

"Well, it's not happening today," Eddie declared. "I have other things in mind."

Sure enough, Eddie disappeared during the last lesson of the day, leaving Buck and Christopher to shrug at each other. Once school was finished, he reappeared and gestured for them to follow him out to the backyard.

He'd laid out a picnic blanket, poured some icy cold lemonade, and laid out some snacks. "We're getting some sunshine," he announced, as Buck helped Christopher sit on the blanket. "You two spend too much time inside."

Buck and Christopher exchanged a look. "We do come out after our nap," Christopher said, clearly annoyed that their routine had been disrupted. " _Dad."_

"I can't believe you two are napping," Eddie admonished, passing Christopher a glass. "Here, bud. Hang on to it."

"We just feel that the best reward for good schoolwork is a solid forty-five minute nap on the new bed before tackling anything new," Buck replied diplomatically. "Right, Chris?"

"Right," Christopher said firmly.

"I'm going to tell Carla about this," Eddie murmured.

Buck raised his eyebrows at him, and then said, "Well, if you want to be a tattle-tale, that's your decision."

"Yeah, Dad," Christopher agreed.

"You can be Team Awesome, or not," Buck added. "We're Team Awesome. What's it gonna be, Eds?"

Eddie gave them a mock-glare. "You can't have a team without me."

"It kinda seems like we already _do_ ," Buck murmured, leaning back, sharing another knowing look with Christopher. "What do you think?"

Christopher was trying to play it cool, but crumbling with every glance at Eddie, whose lip was sticking further and further out. "No, Dad," he said urgently, giving in completely. "You can be on our team."

Eddie flashed Buck a smug smile. "See?"

"Traitor," Buck whispered to Christopher, who laughed at him.

The three were silent for a moment, listening to the sound of birds chirping above them. Buck had his face tilted towards the sun, feeling _okay_ again for the first time in a few days, when he felt Eddie's hand on his calf, shaking his leg.

"Hey, Chris," Eddie said, a little nervously. "What do you think about… Buck being my boyfriend?"

Oh, he had an ulterior motive for the impromptu picnic. Buck turned to Christopher, who simply looked confused.

"Boyfriend?"

"Yeah, like… if Buck and I started dating, would you be okay with that?"

He looked back and forth between them, puzzled. "Yes?"

"Like… how your Mom and I were together," Eddie clarified.

Christopher sighed. "I _know_ ," he replied, "but I thought Buck was already your boyfriend. Carla says you two are meant to be. That means love, right?"

Eddie raised his eyebrows at Buck, who couldn't help but grin. "She said that?"

"Uh huh." Christopher plucked an apple slice from the tray and bit into it. "That means Buck's going to stay forever."

Buck shrugged. "If your dad wants me to."

"I do," Eddie said quickly. "Just so we're clear."

"Ask me on a date first, Diaz," Buck teased.

Eddie shoved him playfully, and then turned his full attention to Christopher. "So you're okay with me having a boyfriend?"

"Only as long as it's Buck," Christopher said with satisfaction. "Otherwise, no."

"The kid makes a good point," Buck said, reaching out his fist so Christopher could bump it with his own. "He's very much on Team Awesome."

"You gotta stop making teams without me," Eddie complained, but leaned over to pull Christopher into a hug. "Thanks, kiddo."

"For what? I just want you and Buck to be happy."

"I think all three of us are going to be." Eddie smacked a kiss to his cheek, ignoring Christopher's groans of protest, and sat back again. "Right, Buck?"

Buck nodded. "And for the record, any team we have automatically includes you. You know that."

A bright smile lit up Eddie's face. "Good," he replied. "As it should be."

Contented, Buck flopped on his back on the picnic blanket, gazing up at the sky. A little bit of acceptance about the disastrous rescue on Saturday had begun to creep in, and he wasn't feeling so grief-stricken about it. Just being at home with Eddie and Christopher and not having any real responsibilities for the last few days had helped enormously, and he wasn't feeling like he might break down at any given moment anymore.

Christopher suddenly slapped his stomach, and he popped his head up. "Yes?"

"Can we look on Amazon and buy some new books?" he asked hopefully.

Buck furrowed his brow. "We bought some new books last week."

"I've read them," he complained, shaking Buck's leg. " _Buck._ "

"You read all those books in a week?" he asked skeptically.

"Yes."

"All six of those books, you've read."

"Yes!"

"Lies."

Eddie was watching them with a small smile playing on his lips. "You're not usually that quick, bud."

Christopher sighed. "I just want something new. Because I can't go anywhere. It's not fair. Why can't we go to the beach?"

Buck glanced at Eddie again, who said gently, "You know why, Chris. There's a pandemic."

Christopher's good mood was forgotten, and his lower lip was sticking out. "I don't care."

"I do care," Eddie said, reaching out to take his hand. "This is a very dangerous flu, Chris, and if you caught it, you could get very sick and end up in hospital again. That's why Buck and I make sure that we change our clothes and wash up before we give you a hug after we get home. We're trying to keep you safe."

"I miss my friends," Christopher murmured, tears filling his eyes.

"I know," Eddie said, sitting up, pulling Christopher onto his lap. "I know. I'm sorry, buddy. I know you're lonely and you miss them."

"We can buy some more books, Chris," Buck offered, sitting up as well. "Maybe we need a new project, now that the vegetable garden is up and running. You want to buy some art supplies? Paints and an easel, maybe? We could learn to paint together."

Christopher thought about it for a moment, his brow furrowed, and then nodded. "Okay. We can do that."

"I'll look into it." Buck smiled at him. "Hey, you've been so good. This isn't forever."

"But you're staying, right," Christopher clarified, looking back and forth between them. "Forever?"

Eddie rested his head on Christopher's shoulder, smiling at Buck, and said, "Yep."

Buck was too delighted to ask whether or not he had a say in the matter.

~~

Eddie put Christopher to bed and then wandered around the house, flicking off the lights, before joining Buck in the bedroom. Buck was shirtless, on his knees on the bed, a small Amazon box on the covers beside him.

"What's going on?" Eddie asked, shutting the door firmly. "What are you doing?"

Buck upended the box – out dropped a bottle of lube, two packs of condoms, some hand sanitiser – "It was back in stock," Buck said, quickly moving the bottle to the bedside table – some grooming supplies, and a pack of douches. Eddie picked up the box, his brow furrowed. "They're for me, so you can… really fucking rail me," Buck explained, taking the box out of his hands. "You just tell me when and I'll be ready."

He couldn't help but grin, crawling onto the bed beside him. "You… want to bottom?"

"Oh fuck yeah." Buck bit his lip. "Yeah, definitely. I only wish we could go back to the loft so we don't have to be quiet."

Eddie picked at the supplies, glancing at him curiously. "Are you feeling okay? Truthfully. I feel like today was a lot better than yesterday."

Buck nodded. "I'm all right, but… I'd be better if you took your clothes off."

Eddie raised his eyebrows. "Are you sure? I don't want to push you into anything…"

"Eddie, you're not," he said firmly, ripping open the pack of condoms. "I just want to touch you. _Please._ "

So Eddie pulled his shirt off and let it fall to the floor, moving so he was straddling Buck's lap. He'd never been with a guy before but that didn't matter, because Buck's hands were on his chest and he was staring up at him like he couldn't believe what he was seeing.

"You sure about this, Diaz?" Buck asked him.

He had never been so sure about anything in his life, and leaned down to claim Buck's lips in a hungry kiss, cupping his face with both hands. Buck tasted minty, and he was a great kisser, and Eddie became so lost in it that he slipped off Buck's lap and onto his side on the bed, totally mesmerised by his soft, pillowy lips. Buck's hands were on his chest and then lower, sliding down under the waistband of his sweats to grab a handful of his ass. Their legs tangled together, but Buck's hand remained in place, until Eddie broke their kiss and said, "Do you have a butt fixation or something?"

Buck bit his lower lip, shrugging at him. "Yours, yeah. It's a good butt."

"Is it?"

"You know it is." Buck kissed him again, rolling him onto his back, releasing his grip on his ass to slid one hand down Eddie's chest to his stomach, and then under the elastic of his pants, stopping in the patch of hair above his cock. Eddie was already breathing heavily, staring up at him, biting down on his lower lip.

"You're sure, right?" Buck asked him again, and from the strain in his voice it was clear to Eddie that he might die if he said no.

He had nothing to worry about. Eddie nodded firmly. "Yep."

Buck grinned, and said, "I've wanted to do this for so long; you have no idea. I'm really glad you asked me to stay. I didn't think sex was going to be part of the deal."

"Well, you take what you can get," Eddie teased, and Buck smothered his laughter with kiss.

~

One night of sex with Buck, and Eddie was done for. There was no going back. Any questions lingering in his mind about his sexuality were almost immediately answered with a resounding, _yep, I like men, this is what I want - this feels right._

It didn't hurt that it was the greatest sex of his life, and he'd come more than once, for the first time… ever. He'd always liked being in control, and Buck had no problems letting him take charge and set the pace. And for the first time since they'd known each other, he'd finally been able to do what he always wanted – exploring every single inch of Buck's body; every tattoo, every blemish, scar, freckle… from the small raised bump on his knee from where he'd fallen off his bike as a kid, to the angry scars on his leg, permanent reminders of the truck explosion, to the cluster of moles on his back that kind of looked like Mickey Mouse ears.

He mapped Buck's body, left marks of his own – temporary reminders, tiny little love bites on the inside of his thighs – and had a crash course in giving head which he guessed he passed with flying colours, because Buck was a whimpering mess at the end of it.

And then the best part – someone to spoon with, and falling asleep curled around Buck, where he felt like he was always supposed to be.

~

Eddie had Tuesday off as well, which was a good thing after their late night. He awoke to find Buck's head on his shoulder, one arm thrown across his chest, still sleeping soundly.

He woke him up with kisses, paying particular attention to the birthmark over his left eye, and just as Buck was blinking sleepily at him with a smile on his face, the alarm began to blare, startling them both. Buck groaned, stretching his arms out, as Eddie leaned over to shut it off.

"Gotta wake the kid," Buck yawned.

"Yep." Eddie sat up, knocking a box of condoms onto the floor. "Did you buy enough condoms?"

"Well, neither of us can get tested until everything opens up again," Buck replied as he sat up. "So we'll have to be careful. I mean, technically we both should've had one on last night. I got tested right before I started dating Ali, but not since, so… yeah."

Eddie nodded, examining the box. "And the other stuff?"

"Just to make it easier. I can get ready tonight, if you want me to." Buck moved so he was sitting behind him, kissing the back of his neck. "Do you want to fuck me?"

Eddie nodded, turning his head to the side. "Yeah, I really do."

"Good. You know, you're a little bigger than I'm used to, so… go easy on me, champ." Buck kissed his cheek, hugging him from behind.

"I'm going to take that as a compliment."

"Oh, it is." Buck kissed his cheek again. "Come on. Let's get the day started."

They shared the shower for the first time, kissing under the spray, but Eddie cut things short before it turned too intense. He was running a hand over his chin at the mirror, wondering if he should shave, when Buck pinched his butt and said, "So, remember how we talked about waxing?"

Suddenly bashful, Eddie grabbed a towel from the rack and wrapped it around his waist. "Yes."

"You don't need to. You are… all good," Buck said with a devilish smirk. "Very good. Very nice."

Eddie grinned at him, shaking his head good-naturedly. "Glad I get the Buckley seal of approval."

"Oh yeah, it turns out I like my men hairy."

"You better not start calling me a bear or whatever it is," Eddie warned, reaching for his razor, but stopping when Buck grabbed his hand. "Can I shave?"

"Nope. I like a little scruff." Buck nosed against his neck.

"You gonna start dictating to me, Buckley?"

Buck snickered. "I already do."

~

Eddie wasn't all that surprised with how easily they settled into being a couple – in fact, it was like they'd both been holding back their affection for each other for years, and with it all out in the open, they could finally just be themselves for once. It turned out that Buck was incredibly touchy-feely, and loved to be in Eddie's space as much as possible – when they were watching movies on the couch, he would drape himself over Eddie and curl up like a contented cat.

And Eddie just wanted to do nice things for him, and with his options limited due to the lockdown, that meant buying random things on Amazon and having them delivered to the house – like a big pack of Orbeez, which he was sure would turn into a disaster but instead proved to be incredibly fun, when they filled up Christopher's old paddling pool to make them grow. Eddie arrived home the next evening to find that Buck and Christopher had spent the afternoon filling balloons with the Orbeez, and that night was an all-out war in the backyard, as they ran around throwing the weirdest water balloons ever at each other, Christopher hanging onto Buck's back and shrieking with laughter.

The next random thing he bought was kinetic sand, and that night found Buck and Christopher still completely entranced with the stuff, which was all over the dining room table. He ordered art supplies for them next, but Christopher decided he wasn't into it pretty quickly. Surprisingly, Buck turned out to be a decent artist – which, judging from the state of his handwriting, Eddie never would've guessed. He painted a mountain scene, copying a Bob Ross video, and Eddie had it framed and hung in the living room.

Eddie often sent home food deliveries so that Buck wouldn't feel obligated to cook, and occasionally he'd order a cake from a bakery and have that delivered as well. He was out of the house for almost twelve hours a day, so coming home to find his two favourite people happy and content was the best part of his day.

Buck still had his moments, particularly when he had to return to work for the first time after the incident at the lake – he'd been a little hesitant as he dressed that morning, but Eddie reassured him that Bobby, Hen and Chimney would all be on duty with him for the first day, so he'd be with his friends. Bobby had also decided that if for some reason there was going to be any kind of water rescue, Buck would be able to sit it out, no questions asked.

Whether he actually would was another story, but the option was there.

Thankfully, Buck's first weekend back at work passed without incident, and when he finally arrived home on Sunday evening and bounded up the front path to greet Eddie at the door with a kiss, he was in great spirits. It turned out he'd spent the afternoon rescuing kittens from a sewer drain, but he'd cleaned up at work and smelled surprisingly great for someone who'd been around filthy sewer water most of the day.

And at night, with Christopher asleep in bed, Eddie was able to rid Buck of his pesky clothes and fall into bed with him – their nightly routine all the better with the extra addition of sex – some nights vigorous, other nights slow and sweet, and some nights, like after Buck had been at work for forty-eight hours, filled with urgency.

They'd only been sleeping together a few weeks and Eddie had figured out how to drive Buck insane – tease him with his tongue and fingers until he was begging and pleading, followed by a sweet, slide inside, with Buck's hips tilted up and their lips pressed together, and then… he did whatever Buck wanted, and Buck was not shy about directing. Buck was not shy about anything, in fact, because Buck loved sex, and he seemed to especially love sex with Eddie.

"I can't believe I've known you for two years," Buck panted against his lips, one leg over Eddie's shoulder, their skin slapping together, "and you haven't been doing this to me the whole time. You fucking hold-out. You bastard. I hate you for not doing this the whole time."

"Don't say you hate me," Eddie begged, kissing him again. "I love you; don't say that."

"Oh I love you so much," Buck groaned, "that sometimes I hate you for not loving me longer."

For that, Eddie pounded him as hard as he could, and Buck's eyes practically rolled back in his head.

~~

Towards the end of April, a few things had become abundantly clear.

The first was that the Covid crisis wasn't going away anytime soon, and that Christopher was going to be spending months at home rather than attending school.

The second was that Buck couldn't afford to take time off work indefinitely, and they were going to have to come up with a new plan.

And the third was that it made sense for Buck to move in permanently and give up his loft. The ongoing pandemic plus their relationship plus working out a system to take care of Christopher meant that Buck was paying rent for somewhere he likely wouldn't be returning to, ever.

So he finalised his lease, moved his furniture into a storage container, and changed his address details to Eddie's house. They had arranged for Carla to be there for Christopher while they were both at work, on the days that they were sharing shifts, and so on their first day at the station together in months, they sat down with Bobby in his office.

"What's up?" Bobby asked them, adjusting his mask so it was sitting more comfortably across his nose.

Buck said, "I need to change all my address details and emergency contact and health insurance stuff. I'm living with Eddie full time now."

Bobby raised his eyebrows, clearly smiling beneath his mask. "So it's official."

Buck and Eddie exchanged a glance, and Eddie said, "Yeah, it's official. We were going to tell everyone today, when Maddie and Athena are here for lunch."

"Maddie doesn't know?"

"Not yet, but we're guessing she and Chim have some news of their own," Eddie said dryly.

Bobby chuckled, rummaging around on his desk for some forms. "So Covid was the thing that finally brought you two together, huh," he mused. "I thought for sure Buck would've told you he was in love with you after the well rescue."

Eddie turned to Buck with his eyebrows raised, and Buck said awkwardly, "In my defence, I didn't realise I was in love with him at that point."

Bobby arched an eyebrow. "You and I remember that differently, don't we?"

"What happened?" Eddie asked curiously, squeezing Buck's knee. "What's he talking about?"

"You never told him?" Bobby asked curiously.

Buck shook his head, embarrassed. "There were other things going on at the time; I didn't think he'd be too interested."

"In what?" Eddie asked insistently. "What happened?"

He winced. "I might've… lost my cool a bit. After the collapse. In front of everyone."

"Lost your cool," Eddie repeated. "Implying that you were cool to begin with."

"Yeah, well…" Buck shrugged. "I really love you, Eddie. That's why."

Both Bobby and Eddie were silent for a moment, and then Eddie leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. "I love you too. I knew you would've been freaked out; you cried in the ambulance on the way to the hospital."

Buck wrinkled his nose. "In my defence, I didn't realise you saw me do that."

"Everyone saw you do that, but it's okay." Eddie squeezed his hand, and then looked over at Bobby again. "So, we're… in a relationship now, Cap. What do we need to do?"

~

They completed some forms, signed their names, and left Bobby's office, making a concerted effort to act as though they weren't a couple. Chimney was bopping around the kitchen, while Hen gave him a suspicious look as she sipped her coffee, and Eddie murmured to Buck, "Maddie's definitely pregnant."

Buck nodded. "Yep. Guaranteed."

"We'll have to act surprised." Eddie patted him on the back and went to make a cup of coffee, as Hen and Chimney greeted Buck enthusiastically. Buck had hardly spent any time with them over the past few months – just a shift here and there, with whoever was rostered on the weekends, so they had a lot to catch up on.

Chimney was uncharacteristically cagey, which meant that a big announcement was on the way. Buck thought about pressing him for information, but held back – if Maddie really was pregnant (and he was pretty sure she was; she had a certain glow about her whenever they caught up via Facetime), he would sit back and wait for the big announcement.

They were called out to a gas leak in the morning, and when they returned to the station at lunchtime, Maddie, Athena and Karen were already there, laying out food for the whole team. Buck hadn't seen Maddie in person in almost two months, and he was out of the truck and taking the stairs two at a time to greet her.

They couldn't hug, but god, he wanted to, and so they settled for bouncing up and down a safe distance apart for a few minutes. She was _definitely_ pregnant, but he kept his mouth shut.

Maddie gestured for him to follow her away from the group, and hugged herself tightly as she gazed at him with tearful eyes. "How are you? I get the feeling that you're super happy but I don't know why."

He couldn't help but glance over at Eddie, who was laughing with Karen in the kitchen. "Eddie told me he loved me, and I love him too."

"Evan!" Maddie hissed, clapping her hands over the mask covering her mouth. "Really? Love in lockdown?"

"Before that, but yeah. I moved in with him permanently; got rid of the loft." He shrugged at her. "It just… makes sense for now. No point in paying rent on somewhere I'm not living."

"So you're just… fast forwarding through all the stages of being in a relationship with someone," she said. "Like, have you been on a date?"

"Well, kind of. Christopher went to bed early one night so we ordered a pizza and ate it in the backyard, and called it our first date." And they'd kissed for a while, too, which had been nice.

Maddie was wearing a mask, but she was clearly smiling from ear to ear. "So you're happy."

He nodded. "Very."

"Then I'm so happy for you, Evan. I just wanted you to find your family."

"I think I can stop looking; Eddie's been pretty clear about what he wants. He couldn't wait to pack up the loft. Most of my stuff is in storage."

"I did think it was weird that you were moving in with Eddie, knowing that his house is only two bedrooms. And I was pretty sure that he didn't have a futon." Maddie raised her eyebrows at him knowingly.

Buck shrugged. "When were you going to tell me?" he asked pointedly, nodding at her slightly protruding stomach – she'd tried to hide it, and it wasn't totally noticeable, but he could tell.

Maddie glared at him playfully. "Shhh."

He leaned in and said in a low, conspiratorial voice, "I can't wait to be an uncle."

She whispered back, "You're going to be great at it."

They were smiling at each other – hidden under their masks – when Athena called everyone over to the very spaced-out tables for lunch.

Buck slipped in beside Eddie, who rubbed his knee discreetly under the table, sharing an affectionate look with him. That look didn't go unnoticed by Karen or Athena, who exchanged a pointed look of their own before taking their respective seats.

The problem was that Maddie and Chimney clearly planned to announce their news, and that news was way more important than Buck and Eddie's, so they weren't sure how to address everyone. They didn't care about having their thunder stolen, it was more 'ripping the bandaid off' and letting everyone know they were a couple.

Finally Buck glanced over at Maddie, tilting his head towards Eddie discreetly. She raised her eyebrows at him in a silent question, and then seemed to realise what he was asking, and nodded vigorously. So during a lull in conversation, Buck nudged Eddie under the table and then cleared his throat. "Uh, quick announcement – Eddie and I are a couple, and I've moved in permanently. That's it."

There was dead silence at the table. Chimney was staring at them with high eyebrows; Hen was exchanging another knowing glance with Karen; Maddie was positively bursting with joy, and Bobby and Athena were gazing at them fondly.

"Good to hear, Buckaroo," Athena said, gesturing to him with her fork. "We're very happy for you both."

Buck took Eddie's hand under the table and squeezed it. "Thank you. That's it; moving on." He couldn't help but glance at Chimney and Maddie, who were having a silent conversation of their own.

"We have news too," Maddie finally said excitedly, her hands wrapped around Chimney's bicep. "We actually found out the day of May's graduation but we were waiting for the three month mark to tell everyone – I'm pregnant, and we're engaged, and we're getting married sometime next year after the baby is born and the pandemic is under control, hopefully."

At that, the table exploded with commotion, as everyone rushed to congratulate them. Maddie caught Buck's eye, and he raised his glass to her with a smile.

~

"Are you happy?" Eddie asked Buck later that night, as they settled into bed beside each other.

"Yes," he replied, pressing his lips to the back of Eddie's hand. "Oh yeah, definitely. Are you?"

"Couldn't be happier," he replied, and passed Buck a set of pages stapled together. "Christopher got an A for his story. Remember the one about the knight falling in love with the princess?"

"That was months ago," Buck said, taking it out of his hands and skimming it. "He changed it!"

"The knight falls in love with a prince," Eddie said with a chuckle, "and their names are interesting. Prince Evan and Sir Edmundo the Brave."

"The Brave," Buck repeated in amusement. "Hey, do you think his teacher knows—"

"Yep, one hundred percent, Ms Flores knows that my name is Edmundo and that you are also Christopher's guardian, but… hey. It's pretty sweet."

Buck was reading the story, unable to wipe the smile from his face. "So as I understand it, Prince Evan is pretty unhappy with his life in a fancy castle," he said, as Eddie nestled in close to him. "And then one day at the joust – oh, I bet he picked that up from that YouTube video we watched about jousting – he sees a handsome knight, and after a little bit of flirting—"

"I don't know what Christopher was going for with this, but Prince Evan is thirsting hard for Sir Edmundo in that whole part."

"Yeah, well, I can't blame the guy, this Sir Edmundo sounds _amazing_ ," Buck murmured, flipping to the next page. "Oh, there's an evil king… and very quickly Sir Edmundo defeats him by putting out the fire in his chimney – okay, is the king actually meant to be Chimney? Because he has _nailed it._ "

"I think it is, and I also think we probably won't tell Chim about this," Eddie murmured.

"I'm rubbing it in his face. So… the fire is out, the king is defeated – that was very quick but why mess around, you know? They met and liked each other, a king needed defeating so the bravest knight in the land did it, and now they're living happily ever after. No wonder it got an A – I'd nominate it for an Oscar."

"They don't give Oscars for short stories written by nine-year-olds," Eddie pointed out.

"Well, still. I say we frame it." Buck looked around at the bare walls of the bedroom, and said, "I also think we buy some pictures for in here."

"Whatever you want." Eddie kissed his cheek. "I don't care. I don't need stuff."

"Yeah, but I do." Buck read through the story again, unable to stop smiling. "He really knew before we did, didn't he?"

"He's the smartest kid I know. Way smarter than you and I. Of course he did."

"I'm going to make him pancakes tomorrow." Buck handed the story back to Eddie, who tucked it into a plastic folder and set it on the floor.

"You do whatever you want." Eddie flicked the lamp off, tucking in close to him again. "I'm really glad you decided to quarantine with us."

"I'm really glad you asked." Buck kissed his forehead.

"But for the next pandemic—"

"Oh god, can we get through this one first?"

Eddie chuckled. "For the next one, I say we quarantine in New Zealand because they've got it figured out."

"Well, they actually have a competent government." Buck trailed his fingers up and down Eddie's smooth back. "I love you, Eddie."

"I love you too, Buck."

-the end-

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to Kat ([cinematicnomad](https://cinematicnomad.tumblr.com/) on Tumblr) for all your help!
> 
> The title is from [This is the Day - The The](https://youtu.be/7ZYgKCbFbWY)
> 
> Talk to me @ Tumblr: [woodchoc-magnum](https://woodchoc-magnum.tumblr.com/)


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